Garfield Gets a Life (1991)

I actually did know something about this when I first went into it. Back when I was first watching the Garfield primetime specials, I came across a video by a YouTube channel called ElectricDragon505, where the user gave his personal ranking of all twelve. (He was the one who ranked Babes and Bullets at the very top of his list and, as I said back when I reviewed that one, it's not hard to understand why.) At the very bottom was Garfield Gets a Life, not because he felt it was bad, but because the plot was nothing more than Jon trying to get a date, something we've already seen him struggle with a lot, both in other specials and in various episodes of Garfield and Friends. By extension, I also learned that Jon is really the protagonist here, while Garfield just tags along for support, or, rather, to comment on his failures. And I knew I was in for quite an epic dance sequence on Jon's part, given some of the clips featured. While I can't remember what my exact impression of the special was when I first saw it, I do think I liked it more than ElectricDragon505. Upon re-watching it again, I'd say that I would rank it on the lower end as well, but I also think I would put it above Garfield in Paradise, as well as maybe Garfield's Thanksgiving. Regardless, like all of the specials, it is watchable, making for a breezy 22 minutes, and there are a good amount of funny moments to be had, including some jokes that kind of shocked me. However, there is, indeed, not a lot to it plot-wise, Garfield is a supporting character (though he's always present as such), and, above all else, if you don't find the idea of a cartoon centered around Jon's lack of a love-life appealing, you're not likely to get much out of it.

As he goes through his morning routine, Jon realizes he's stuck in a boring rut and needs to get a life. Garfield, by extension, feels that the sooner Jon gets a life, the sooner he can get on with his. But when Jon proves to have a lack of motivation, Garfield pushes him along by giving him a book called How to Make Friends and Fool the Rest. Jon focuses on a chapter about picking up women, but no matter where or how he tries to put it into practice, his attempts fall completely flat. Later, while watching TV with Garfield and Odie, he sees an advertisement for the "Lorenzo School for the Personality Impaired," which promises to help even the most boring, uninteresting people get a life. Jon opts to attend and, during his very first class, about making a good first impression, he meets a woman named Mona, who turns out to be as self-conscious and unsure of herself as Jon. As a result, the two of them hit it off by just being themselves, and they quickly leave the school and go out on a date. But, now that Jon seems to have found somebody, Garfield worries that Mona may drive a wedge between him and his owner.

Like I've said throughout this series of reviews, Garfield Gets a Life is the only one of these specials not to be directed by Phil Roman in any capacity (he still acted as a producer on it). Instead, John Sparey, who'd co-directed the last handful of them with Roman and Bob Nesler, directed it himself. This also ended up being the very last of the specials altogether, as CBS decided there was no longer any need for them since Garfield and Friends was doing so well. Following Garfield Gets a Life, Sparey, in addition to some episodes of that show, would only direct one other project: an animated Christmas-themed TV special called Nick & Noel. Otherwise, he mainly continued working as an animator, having done so in the past on movies like The Black Cauldron, Oliver & Company, Fritz the Cat, Coonskin, and Fire and Ice. Among his last couple of credits in this regard were as a sequence director on Tom and Jerry: The Movie, which Roman directed, and as an animator on The Swan Princess. Sparey died in 2010, at the age of 83.

As others have noted, the special should really be called Jon Gets a Life, as Jon (voiced by Thom Huge) is very much the central figure here. After he and Garfield sit around the breakfast table, suffering from the Monday Blues, he's next seen counting the ceiling tiles in his bedroom (he finds there are 144 in total), then tells Garfield that he'd organize his sock drawer next, but already did it the night before. And when Garfield checks the drawer, he finds that Jon actually put a lot of thought and effort into it, sorting the socks by color and size. As he specifies the different types of socks and where they are (winter socks, summer socks, natural fiber socks, man-made fiber socks, etc.), he realizes that he does, indeed, need to get a life. But after he tries on a very tacky suit, much to Garfield's horror, and walks right into the wall, Jon needs to be pushed into taking further action by looking through the book How to Make Friends and Fool the Rest. He follows its directions about picking up women at various places, like a singles club, the laundromat, the video store, and the beach, but finds himself shot down at every turn, mostly due to his being a massive dork whose attempts at impressing women are the definition of cringe. And in one scene, he's talking to a "woman" in a department store, only for her to turn out to be a mannequin. It gets to the point where, as he and Garfield are sitting on a park bench, Jon says hi to every woman who walks by and they each tell him to go screw himself in some way. After that, he's ready to give up altogether, when he sees the commercial for the Lorenzo School for the Personality Impaired. Hoping they can help him, he enrolls and, during his first class, meets Mona, whom he forms a connection with. Unfortunately, said connection causes concern for Garfield.

Speaking of which, Garfield (voiced by Lorenzo Music) is intent on helping Jon get a life because he's just as bored, adding, "The sooner you get happy with your life, the sooner I can get back to mine." He tags along with Jon and makes snarky, sarcastic comments about him and his sorry attempts to land a date; in other words, he's just doing what he always does. Among his memorable lines and jokes is a shockingly dark comment he makes at the video store: "Can we get Old Yeller? I just love movies with happy endings." (No joke, I burst out laughing and thought, "Oh, my God!") Also, when Jon's attempt at landing a date there leaves him with a videotape shoved in his mouth, the clerk asks him, "Will you be renting that tape, sir?", and Garfield comments, "No, he'll be eating it here." At the beach, Jon gets a beach-ball stuffed in his mouth and, to that, Garfield says, "Nice going, Jon. Here we are, tryin' to find you a life, and all you can think about is eating." And his fainting when he pops the store mannequin's hand off after talking with it has Garfield commenting, "Oh, let's give him a hand for trying," and then clapping. As they then sit on a park bench, Jon laments, "This may come as a surprise to you, Garfield, but I'm just not very good at getting a date," and Garfield, in the most obvious of sarcastic tones, remarks, "No! Go on! You're putting me on!" He proceeds to call out every rebuff Jon gets from a passing woman as a strike, before later accompanying him to the Lorenzo School for the Personality Impaired. There, in a class on making a good first impression, Garfield joins in the exercise about shaking hands and introducing oneself by attempting to do it with a rather unhealthy-looking guy sitting behind him, saying, "Hello, my name is Garfield. You probably notice I'm quite short and have excessive body hair." The guy doesn't respond to him at all. And when, during the part about pretending to speak a foreign language, Jon and Mona walk out, speaking a smattering of French, Garfield grumbles, " Hey, Monsieur Dumb Guy, remember me? What am I, chopped liver? Duck pate? Foie gras?", then wonders, "Why am I getting so hungry?"

Thus begins Garfield's worry that Jon is forgetting about him, reinforced when he eavesdrops on them talking on the porch and Jon simply refers to him as, "My cat." He laments, "Yesterday, I had a name. Yesterday, I was his bosom buddy. His confidant. Today, I'm his cat!" Then, shocked at the idea that a woman, other than his mother, actually likes Jon, Garfield has a dream where he and Mona continue dating, get married, and have a baby, who proceeds to terrorize Garfield. Waking up when the 

baby goes to bite his tail, Garfield attempts to break up the relationship, exclaiming, "I must stop him before he multiplies!" But, when he wedges himself between them and tries to convince Jon to stop dating Mona, she proceeds to scratch Garfield behind the ears. Initially, he tries to resist the sensation, claiming to Jon that she's using him as a way of strengthening her hold on him. But, Garfield starts to fall for her, and even crawls into her lap, as she rubs his back. He futilely continues trying to break them up, but it's clearly a lost cause.,, until Mona turns out to be 

allergic to cats. Garfield isn't exactly broken up about this but then, much to his horror, Jon initially suggests shaving him! He's then on pins and needles, as Jon seems to try to choose between them, but, fortunately, he does ultimately embrace Garfield. That doesn't dissuade Jon from continuing to see Mona, though. Garfield, however, is intent on being their chaperone, saying, "Jon's more than a friend to me. He's my meal-ticket."

Odie (voiced by Gregg Berger) only appears a small handful of times and has no role in the story at all. He shows up at the beginning, happy and carefree, unlike bored Garfield and Jon, with the latter tossing him a piece of toast. He reappears briefly afterward, when Garfield is watching TV (there is no point for him to pop up there, as he literally walks in, then walks off when Garfield turns the TV off), and again when Garfield is talking about how humans should appreciate the, "Simple things in life, like lasagna, a good nap, family." When he puts his arm around Odie as he stands there, panting, Garfield comments, "Dog breath. P.U.," and walks off, as Odie turns to the screen and goes, "Huh?" And finally, he's watching TV with Garfield and Jon, when they see the commercial for the Lorenzo School for the Personality Impaired. 

As Garfield himself notes, it's surprising how, after all of his bad luck, Jon not only finds a woman who likes him in Mona (voiced by June Foray), but also someone who has a similarly awkward, insecure personality. When they meet during the class about making a good first impression, she asks him if hers was okay, saying she has no idea what she's doing. Jon, in turn, asks how his first impression came off, and when neither of them can give satisfactory answers, they both lament that they're ruining it. That breaks the ice, and they stop listening to Lorenzo to have a casual conversation, with Mona admitting, "I was so shy in gym class, I had my sister take my showers for me" (she also later says that, like Jon, she once got her tongue stuck in an elevator door). It also turns out that she was at the beach when Jon made an idiot out of himself with his desperate attempts to impress women but, fortunately, she doesn't recognize him. Eventually, they decide to leave and go out to dinner. That night, they're talking out on Jon's front step, and realize that they can enjoy each other's company by just being themselves. Garfield, realizing what this may lead to, attempts to break them up, but when Mona scratches him behind the ear and then rubs his back, he starts to fall for her as well. But Mona starts sneezing, and has to admit that she's allergic to cats. Moreover, medications don't work, but Jon hates the idea of giving up somebody he connects with so well. While he does opt not to put Garfield through the humiliation of being shaved, he and Mona decide to continue seeing each other, though Garfield is intent on chaperoning them.

While he comes off as big and boisterous on the TV, in reality, Lorenzo (voiced by Frank Welker) is much more low-key when Jon and Garfield meet him in person. Lorenzo says, "That was a lip synch, you know. My body, Charlton Heston's voice. It's, uh, a theatrical thing. It's done quite often." (Trust me, he did not have Charlton Heston's voice in that commercial.) He also gets Jon's last name wrong, calling him "Mr. Airbuckle." In his class, he first reminds everyone of the company motto, "If you can

get a pulse, you can get a life," then tells them to check for a pulse and raise their hands if they don't have one. Apparently, several do raise their hands, so Lorenzo has his assistant give them each a second opinion. He continues on with the class, first teaching them how to make a good first impression (looking someone right in the eye, giving them a firm handshake, and saying, "Hello. My name is 'so-and-so,"), how to dress for success (by showing off his rather ugly wardrobe ensemble, with his plaid shirt and slacks giving Garfield the urge to play golf), and finally, pretending to speak a foreign language. Lorenzo starts the latter lesson with "Canadian," saying, "Now this is an easy language to learn. You just talk like you normally would, except occasionally, you throw in an 'eh.'" His assistant and receptionist, Priscilla (voiced by Julie Payne), doesn't say or do much, but she's memorable because of how she's a rather bubble-headed, overly happy woman, with a design that's a tad off-putting, to say the least.

While the character designs and backgrounds are back to the traditional Garfield style here, as opposed to some of the last few specials, Garfield Gets a Life is notable in other ways. As ElectricDragon505 said, there's some really good animation here, with the standout being the dance sequence with Jon. Like Franklin's cringe-inducing rap in It's Spring Training, Charlie Brown, words and a few images can't do this bit justice, although I mean that as a compliment in this case. The animation in this entire scene is really 

good and fluid but, as corny and out-of-date as his dance moves are, it's still amazing to see Jon let loose the way he does. He twirls this woman around until he sends her flying towards the bar; you get a close-up of his fancy footwork; another close-up of him shaking his butt (not the first time you see this, unfortunately); him dancing in silhouette; and so on. You also get some cutaways to Garfield's tail swaying as he sits at the bar, corresponding to one of the lyrics in the Temptations song that plays during the scene, 

while the other people on the dance floor grow more and more aghast at what Jon's doing. The animation is also really good during the opening credits sequence, with Jon flexing his non-existent muscles after removing his shirt and shaking his butt (for the first time) at the camera after pulling on his pants, while Garfield has some not so enthusiastic reactions to this. The character of Leonard is quite well-animated in and of himself, as he's always moving and

gesturing, and in one instance, he stretches his neck to get his face right up into the camera, like it was in his TV commercial. And Garfield's movements near the end, when he declares himself Jon and Mona's chaperone, are quite quick and fluid as well.

While it doesn't get as crazy as it could, Garfield's dream about Jon and Mona marrying and having a kid who turns out to be a little terror, at least for him, is animated to come off as a nightmare. This mainly applies to when the scene turns to Christmas and the kid, who's drawn and animated to look psychotic, rabidly tears apart a present that Garfield was holding (there was literally nothing underneath the wrapping paper, by the way), then goes after Garfield himself. He grabs his tail as he tries to run away, and while Garfield breaks away, he runs and gets himself

cornered up against a gigantic wall. You then see the baby crawling towards the screen in a fast and threatening manner before, in a quick series of close-ups, he grabs Garfield's tail and bites into it (yeah, this baby has all of his teeth, by the way). That's when Garfield wakes up and realizes he has to stop this from happening.

The special's presentation and style are also a bit different from what you typically get in a Garfield cartoon. Both the opening credits and that dance sequence make it feel as though the special turned into a music video, especially the latter, with its quick cuts, close-ups corresponding to the song on the soundtrack, and the stylized background in some shots (that's actually just how that singles club's background looks, combined with the dance floor's colored lights). Also, when Garfield is watching TV during the opening, we briefly see some live action

footage when he turns it to the "All National Anthems All The Time" channel and it plays O, Canada. Speaking of which, Garfield watches a couple of shows that are done in a different art style than the actual cartoon itself. One is Yukon Stinky, a show featuring a Dudley-Do-Right kind of character (as well as a poor dog who gets mauled by a bear off-screen), and a noir-like gangster flick with a generic-looking lead character. 

As you've already grasped, much of the humor comes from just how little of a life Jon actually has and what a dork he is when trying to impress women, with Garfield adding his sarcastic quips. When the special begins, you see how utterly bored both of them are, as they both resort to counting the ceiling tiles in the rooms they're in just to kill time (this comes back around when, at the Lorenzo School for the Personality Impaired, they know they've found the right room when they see that everyone in there is counting ceiling tiles before class). When Jon goes

into detail about his overly organized sock drawer, he decides that he needs to get a life, saying, "There's more to life than just socks," and Garfield adds, "There's underwear." But it's when he starts trying to pick up women that the comedy really starts. While he does, believe it or not, find a woman willing to dance with at the singles club, he messes it up with his dancing. Once he's chased nearly everyone out of the club, someone off-screen yells, " Hey, jerk! Disco is dead!" Jon is shocked at that revelation, and on the way out, says, "Boy! You learn a dance and then,

zango! Fourteen years later, they change it!" Garfield remarks, "Go figure." At the laundromat, he meets a woman who's washing a pink tutu and asks if she's a ballerina  She says yes, then points at his boxers, which have teddy bears on them, as Garfield holds them up and she asks, "Are you a dweeb?"; Garfield answers, "Why, yes, he is." And after his disastrous attempt at the video store, which leaves him with a VHS crammed in his mouth, Jon tries to impress some bikini babes on the beach by stretching and

flexing while asking if they've seen his "missing Olympic swimming medals." He then walks off, boasting about how he's planning to do some push-ups, and, coming upon a balding guy with glasses who's buried in the sand, kicks some in his face and tells him to get out of his way. He's about to call him a pipsqueak, when the guy pops out of the sand and reveals he has the body of Arnold Schwarzenegger! That's how Jon gets the beach-ball crammed into his mouth. And you know something's up when Jon is talking to this "woman" who's staring at him with a blank, unblinking expression on her face... and she's then revealed to be a mannequin.

When he and Garfield are sitting on a park bench, Jon gets harshly turned down by every woman who walks by, even when he just says hello. He gets responses like, "Don't flatter yourself!", "Take a hike!" (Jon tries to laugh that one off by responding, "No thanks. I just took one,"), and, "Buzz off!" He then pulls out a guitar and tries to sing the blues, as it starts raining, only for a big guy with his gut hanging out to grab the guitar, throw it on the ground, and start stomping on it! Garfield comments, "And I thought fat people were jolly." While later watching TV with Garfield

and Odie, and seeing Lorenzo's commercial, Jon can't help but hide his face after Lorenzo asks, "Is your idea of a fun Saturday night sittin' home, watchin' television with your kitty cat? [Garfield blows a raspberry at that.] Are you so boring that you could make cheese yawn? Are you so out of touch, you think disco is still in? Have you ever passed time by counting ceiling tiles? Compared to you, does a slug seem hyperactive?" And at the end of the commercial, when Lorenzo says, "Our motto is, 'If you can get a pulse, you can get a life,'" Garfield tells Jon, "Well, maybe they'll take you anyway."

Speaking of Garfield, it's funny watching him be as bored as Jon at the beginning, mainly because Jon leads such a dull life. He tells the audience that he intends to help Jon get a life, "Because Jon's my friend, and I'd do anything to help my friend, no matter what." But then, he pulls up a newspaper and adds, "Unless, of course, there's somethin' good on TV," and realizes it's time for Yukon Stinky. But,he seems just as bored watching the TV, even after the show is over, and like Jon, resorts to counting the ceiling tiles. In addition to his many jokes while Jon

is trying to get a date, he also has some funny moments when he's sitting in class with him. When Lorenzo says the next part of the day's lesson is learning how to dress for success, Garfield gasps, pulls on his fur, and exclaims, "I'm naked!" And when Lorenzo is getting everyone to speak "Canadian" by occasionally adding in an "eh," Garfield remarks, "Great. Let's all go to town, eh? Maybe we can have some lunch, eh?" And twice during the finale, including the very end, he does an imitation of those 

suction plush car toys that were once really popular. Determined to not let Jon go off with Mona without a chaperone, he literally grabs some suction cups, climbs up the back of Jon's car, and attaches himself to the back window, saying, "I saw this on a freeway once." As you can see, he even puts on the same blank expression as those toys.

There's also some humor pertaining to the often ridiculous or inane stuff you run into in everyday life. This especially applies to the television, with Garfield coming across the channel that plays nothing but national anthems, then finds an infomercial for "Ajax Nose Hair Tweezers," where the announcer says, "And if you're not completely satisfied with your Ajax Nose Hair Tweezers, we'll refund all your tweezed nose hair!" It also takes a bite out of the inherent phoniness of this kind of programming, with Lorenzo's commercial featuring some painfully fake 

testimonials. One guy, who looks like his mind is off on another planet, states in a bland, emotionless voice, "I thought I'd never have a personality, but after only fourteen weeks at Lorenzo's School for the Personality Impaired, I now have a great personality." Another guy is dressed up like a matador and, with a similarly vacant look, says, in an even more monotone voice, "Six months ago, I was a school crossing guard. Crossing the street was my life. Now, thanks to Lorenzo's School for the Personality 

Impaired, I am a bullfighter." As the camera pulls back to show him standing in a bullfighting ring while wielding a club, he adds, "And why am I carrying this stick, you ask? Why, that's to keep the women away." In addition, while the commercial shows an image of a posh, fancy university, when Jon and Garfield go to the school in reality, it's a small, rundown building that looks as though it's nearly condemned. And finally, there's a bit of a lesson in how, when it comes down to it, Jon and Mona only need to be themselves to form a bond, rather than follow Leonard's vapid advice.

But as enjoyable as this special can be, I understand why it's not likely to be anyone's favorite. While the plots for these specials, for the most part, can hardly be called mind-bending or complex, this one, in particular, is built around the one joke of Jon not being able to get a date. Not only was that a big part of Garfield's Thanksgiving, two years prior to this, but, like ElectricDragon505 said, if you've watched a lot of Garfield and Friends, you've already seen this scenario a good number of times, often with Liz the veterinarian. There is a nice spin on it here with the 

character of Mona, but still, this is well-worn territory, as is Garfield tagging along on Jon's date and imagining what his life will be like if Jon ever manages to settle down and have a family, specifically with a baby that proceeds to torment him. And speaking of Garfield, while he does have plenty of screentime here (there's no scene that he's not in), some may find it disappointing that he's reduced to a supporting role and that Jon is the protagonist. I don't have a problem with it, because I like Jon, and I think the humor here is effectively funny, as I've gone into, but it is a shame that the series of specials couldn't have ended on a more overall crowd-pleasing note.

Music-wise, this is one special where I find the songs to be more memorable than the actual score by Desiree Goyette and David Benoit. In fact, most of the incidental music feels like extensions of those songs, anyway. There are some noteworthy pieces, though, like this one that plays when Garfield and Jon are so bored that they're counting the ceiling tiles, which sounds like it's signifying the ticking away of time and just how meaningless their lives are at the moment. There's also this slightly bluesy guitar bit when Jon laments his inability to get a date, leading into when he, very briefly, actually sings the blues. And when Garfield dreams about Jon marrying Mona and their having a child, the music transitions from a wondrous, dreamy piece to, when the scene switches to Christmas, a version of Jingle Bells that becomes nightmarish when the kid chases and corners him. As for the actual songs, the cartoon opens with B.B. King performing Monday Morning Blues, emphasizing how much of a rut Garfield and Jon are stuck in as they go through their morning routine. Then, after he was absent in Garfield's Feline Fantasies, Lou Rawls returns for one last opening credits song, this one called Spare Time. Basically, the song tells Jon to do what this entire cartoon is about: get a life. And when Jon dances at the singles club, it's to a song by The Temptations called Shake Your Paw, which matches how out of date his dance moves are (it's still a nice, upbeat song, though, and you can hear Lorenzo Music adding in some brief instances of backup as Garfield).

So, yeah, as the last of the primetime specials, Garfield Gets a Life isn't the best one they could've ended on, but it's far from the worst, too. If you don't want to see a 22-minute cartoon revolving around the oft-used plot of Jon trying to get a date, with Garfield himself being a supporting character (albeit one with a big chunk of screentime), then this isn't for you. But still, you'd be depriving yourself of a lot of truly funny moments and jokes, some of which are rather shocking in how daring they are, really good animation, some noteworthy instances of style that you don't tend to get in these cartoons, and fun songs on the soundtrack. Trust me, when it comes to Garfield, you could do a whole lot worse.