Actors and Filmmakers That I Don't Like

By this point in my reviews, you've no doubt noticed that there are some actors and filmmakers that I respect and admire very much and, conversely, there are others whom I honestly don't care for at all. I know I've talked about some of the ones that I don't like in previous reviews but now, I think it's high time for me to really talk about the actors and filmmakers whose work I just don't like to see on my television screen or from a film projector in a theater. Before we get started, I need to make some things clear. When it comes to most of these people, I don't have anything personal against them. Granted, as we go further up on the list, we'll start running into people who have done stuff that I don't agree with and, therefore, I can't in good conscience support their work but a lot of them are people who I don't hate personally. I just don't like the types of movies they tend to make or the particular style, be it acting or directing, they often partake in. So don't come away from this thinking I have vendettas against every single one of these people because it isn't the case. There are also some people whom I have voiced my displeasure in the past that you will probably be surprised are not on this list. For instance, those of you who read my Batman Forever review may be interested to know that Jim Carrey is not on the list, even though I ripped his performance as the Riddler in that movie to pieces. While I didn't like that particular performance, I don't hate Carrey out and out. I just have mixed opinions about him in that I find him funny in some movies whereas in others, I find him insufferably annoying. I rather like the Ace Ventura movies as well as The Mask so I could hardly put him on this list. Another example is Bill Murray. I've never talked about this before but sometimes, Murray's attitude and personality tend to rub me the wrong way, like how he apparently hasn't spoken to Harold Ramis ever since they had major disagreements during the filming of Groundhog Day. While I don't like his attitude about certain things, I'd be crazy if I hated most of the movies he's been in simply because of that and besides, compared to what some of the higher people on my list have done, his actions have been relatively mild. Director-wise, some may been surprised to know that Tobe Hooper is not on the list seeing as how I've given him a very hard time in past reviews. The thing is, I don't go into his movies with a bad attitude, wanting to hate them. In fact, I've found myself enjoying some of his flicks, like the Texas Chainsaw Massacre movies as well as Lifeforce and The Mangler but the majority of them, I just plain don't like. Still, making bad movies alone is not enough for me to out and out hate someone (I'll elaborate on that when we get to a certain director that is on the list). Also, Roman Polanski is not on the list although I'm sure, after reading some of my reasons for putting certain people on here, others may wonder why he isn't. I have never had such a divided opinion on another person as I do for Polanski. On the one hand, I pity him because of his horrible life, being born in Europe when the Nazis were coming into power and his parents being killed in concentration camps as well as his wife being brutally slaughtered by the Manson family while she was pregnant with his child. However, that does not at all excuse the very sleazy, sick thing he did to that young girl and the fact that he ran afterward, raw court deal or not. So, basically, I have a mixture of pity and disgust for Polanski but the mixture keeps me from out and out hating him (again, keep that in mind when we get to the number one person on my list).

Here's the final thing to contemplate when reading this list: because of my disdain for these people, you will see little-to-none of their films and television shows reviewed by me. Since I don't like these people, I tend to purposefully avoid their stuff. However, the exceptions will be in regard to either actors whom I don't like but who have worked with directors that I do or directors whom I usually don't like but who have one or two films that I just happened upon to see (whether I actually like them or not will be a subject for the actual reviews). So, there you have the things to keep in mind while reading this list. Now, let it begin.

John Hughes: I know I'm crapping on a guy who defined a generation with his movies but I'm not part of that generation. I was born into 1987 and by the time I was old enough to watch and enjoy movies, not only had John Hughes quit directing but his era of filmmaking was way past as well. Don't get me wrong, I don't hate everything the guy did (he was involved in so much stuff in his career be it through directing, writing, or producing that it would be impossible for me to like none of his stuff). John Candy is an actor I like a lot and I love the movies that Hughes gave him prominent roles in like Planes, Trains, and Automobiles (great performance by Candy in that film, by the way) and Uncle Buck. If you've been reading my reviews for a long time, you would also know that I grew up with the Home Alone movies, which he produced, as well as Dennis the Menace. So I like quite a few of his films. But the stuff that he's the most well-known for, like The Breakfast Club, Sixteen Candles, and Ferris Bueller's Day Off are not movies that I can relate to since, again, I'm not part of that generation, and I don't have any inclination to watch them.

Brad Pitt: Ironically, this is the guy on this list, apart from John Huges before him, who probably has the most movies you'll eventually see me review. He's worked three times with David Fincher, a director whom I very much admire, which have resulted three in very good films: Se7en, Fight Club, and The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. He's also worked with Quentin Tarantino in Inglorious Basterds, another well done, enjoyable movie. On top of that, in both those films and others that I've seen clips of, he proves that he's actually quite a good actor. So why is he on this list? Because, while he has given good performances in some awesome films, he's also made some movies that I am not interested in seeing. I don't care about stuff like A River Runs Through It, Meet Joe Black, Being John Malkovich, True Romance, and the Ocean's movies. I don't have anything against them, mind you, they're just not the type of films I seek out. Also, while I do respect him for always fighting against his pretty boy image and actually trying to be an actor in edgy films, it feels like he's sort of lost that desire in recent years and has gone into more mainstream stuff like Troy and Mr. and Mrs. Smith. Basically what I'm saying is that when Pitt works with directors like Fincher and Tarantino, in the end results are movies that I very much like. Otherwise, though, I just don't care about what his next flick is going to be. That's just the way it is.

Jennifer Lopez: Like most of the people on the lower half of the list, Jennifer Lopez is on here simply because she tends to be in the types of movies that I don't like. I don't even think she's that bad at acting. It's just the movies that she's in. Selena? Not interested. The Wedding Planner, Maid in Manhattan, and Monster-in-Law? Not for me. The one movie of hers that I can definitely say you will see reviewed on here at some point is Anaconda and that shouldn't surprise anybody who's a regular viewer of my blog. I haven't The Cell, though, so I may have to get back to you on that. Other than those, don't expect to see many J. Lo movies reviewed on here.

Garry Marshall: I am not a fan of romantic comedies. They're not movies that I have ever been interested in. And that's why Garry Marshall is on here (as well as some other people who will be coming up later) because that's all he ever does. I will give him this: he created Happy Days, which I like (although I haven't watched that show in years now), but other than that, his brand of films don't inspire me at all. Pretty Woman and Runaway Bride aren't my thing (this isn't the only time I'll have to bring those films up either) and neither are the Princess Diaries movies. I will say that I like him as a personality. He has a great, smiling attitude and sense of humor that come across as the personality of a generally nice, fun guy (he was really good during the Happy Days Reunion special back in 2005). I can give him that compliment. But I'm just not the audience for the movies he makes.

John Travolta: Yet another person who's on this list but is fairly low on it simply because I don't care for the types of films he tends to be in. Saturday Night Fever does not interest me at all and neither does Grease (I don't like musicals for the most part), Urban Cowboy, the Look Who's Talking movies, Phenomenon, and definitely not Battlefield Earth. But still, I have no problem with Travolta. He seems like a decent person (despite his recent legal problems) and, unlike a certain person who will appear much higher on this list, he's a scientologist who doesn't his beliefs make him absolutely bat-shit insane. Still, the only films of his that you'll see reviewed on here more than likely will be Carrie and Pulp Fiction (the latter of which I haven't seen in a long time but I remember liking him in it particularly).

Richard Gere: Again, this is simply a matter of me not liking the types of films this actor generally acts in. I have no problem with Gere, it's just that stuff like An Officer and a Gentleman, Internal Affairs, Pretty Woman, and Runaway Bride aren't my cup of tea. It probably won't surprise you that the one film of his that I actually did watch was The Mothman Prophecies. I didn't like that movie either to be honest but it wasn't because of Gere. I thought he did a fine job. I just didn't like the movie itself. Not much more to say other than I don't think Gere is a bad actor at all but he tends to make movies that I'm just interested in.

Julia Roberts: This is getting old, I know, but Julia Roberts is yet another who's on here simply because her general choice of movies just isn't my cup of tea. As I said previously when talking about Richard Gere, Pretty Woman is not a movie I foresee myself watching and neither are Steel Magnolias (although my mom does have a copy of that), Mystic Pizza, Sleeping with the Enemy, and Stepmom. I might review Hook one day when I do a "Directors" installment on Steven Spielberg but that film seems to be the epitome of sappy and overly whimsical movies made around that time that kind of get to me a little bit. (In fact, Spielberg himself kind of created that sub-genre with E.T.) I'm also interested in Mary Reilly since that's an adaptation of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde but, again, I'm not entirely sure if I'll see it any time soon. Julia Roberts: one of the most popular female actors of modern cinema but just not somebody whose career interests me.

Nicholas Cage: I feel bad saying that I don't really care for someone who's had as prolific an acting career as Nicholas Cage but it's the truth. I'm sure he can be a great actor and I know he's had some very lauded performances, having won an Oscar for his role in Leaving Las Vegas, but his movies have all been stuff that just doesn't interest me, either because they're just not my taste or because they're really bad. I'm not interested in stuff like Moonstruck, The Family Man, Bringing Out the Dead, Face/Off, and the National Treasure movies (although my mom really likes both of those flicks). The Ghost Rider flicks also do nothing for me since I know virtually nothing about the comic book character and the clips I've seen didn't impress me with the less than passable CGI. Also, let's face it, Cage has made some really bad career choices, signing on to star in The Sorcerer's Apprentice, Season of the Witch, and the embarrassing Wicker Man remake as well as doing voice-over work for stuff like G-Force and Astro Boy that did either little or nothing at the box-office. To make a long story short, Cage may have had a very long and prolific acting career but his movies don't spike my interest in the least.

Tom Arnold: Boy, you want to talk about somebody who's not relevant at all anymore! Seriously, he should forever kiss James Cameron's feet for putting him in the biggest movie he will ever be in with True Lies! All kidding aside, Tom Arnold is another actor whom I don't have anything against personally and I also don't mind his way of acting either. But, he's made some truly awful career choices. Big Bully was okay but other stuff like McHale's Navy, National Lampoon's Golf Punks, and Soul Plane don't say much for you. Sure, he's had supporting roles in popular films like Nine Months and the first Austin Powers movie but for the most part, he's become a punchline. His marriage to Roseanne also made him the butt of a lot of jokes. I feel bad for putting this guy on here since, as I said, I don't really hate the guy but his career moves have made it very hard for me to say I'm a fan of him.

William Shatner: I am not a Trekkie. I never have been and I don't see myself becoming one any time soon. Therefore, I'm not at all enamored with the character of Captain Kirk or William Shatner himself for that matter. Granted, I haven't seen a lot of the other stuff he's been in (Kingdom of the Spiders and Impulse do intrigue me, though, I must admit), but that acting style of his with those pauses in-between words doesn't do anything for me. I will say that I didn't think he was that bad in those Twilight Zone episodes he was in (like many, I think Nightmare at 20,000 Feet is a real piece of classic science fiction television) but still, they didn't make me a fan of his. Maybe if I see some more of his work, such as those movies I mentioned above, I will change my opinion of Shatner but for right now, I'm not exactly his biggest fan (plus, I've heard that he doesn't treat his fans that well, since he isn't exactly crazy about being constantly identified with the role of Captain Kirk, so there's that too).

Jean-Claude Van Damme: Like another action star who will appear later on this list, Jean-Claude Van Damme doesn't appeal to me simply because the only thing I've ever found impressive about him are his physical skills. He may be really good at martial arts but I've never felt that he's had any sort of charisma as an actor. He's tried to in some films but it always felt forced. The rest of the time, he comes across as bland and emotionless. Also, I know this isn't his fault but I cannot understand half of what he says. Some people have said they have a hard time understanding Arnold Schwarzenegger or Sylvester Stallone but for me, Van Damme is the one who's practically indiscernible when he talks. It might be an unfair bias but it's really hard for me to enjoy someone when I can't understand them when they talk. However, for all of you Van Damme fans out there who are crushed to find him on this list, let me just say that he's lower on here than two other action stars who will be popping up soon. The reason for that is, after his theatrical movie career died off by the end of the 90's, Van Damme has apparently really tried to hone his acting skills by appearing in darker, more character-driven films like JCVD and from what I hear, he's become a pretty damn good actor as a result. In fact, I've heard some say that he's only done his best actual acting work in the latter part of his career. Therefore, I commend Van Damme for seriously trying to hone his craft. It doesn't make me want to rush out right now and see those movies but I still, I respect the man for that.

John Wayne and John Ford: I know a lot of people will probably have a heart attack at the sight of these two being on here but it's the truth and I put them together since they're basically synonymous with each other. I'm not that much of a fan of westerns, first of all. I know that makes me un-American in the eyes of many but it's never been a genre that has interested me. The few that I do like are the ones Clint Eastwood made as well as perhaps those of Sam Peckinpah and the ones that have science fiction elements like The Valley of Gwangi and Cowboys and Aliens. Other than that small handful, I'm not into westerns and that sucks, believe me, because that's all my dad watches for the most part. Anyway, with him as a father, I grew up knowing who John Wayne was whether I wanted to or not. I've never really cared for John Wayne or the image he always had for that matter. I don't hate the guy, mind you, and I know he's sort of the model for all tough guy actors but his attitude, mannerisms, stances, and way of talking were never my type of actor. If that means I'm not American, well fine then but that's just the way I feel. The same feeling applies to John Ford, who worked with Wayne in 21 films. I know Ford is one of the most beloved American filmmakers ever, having been credited with basically creating the genre of the western as well as pioneering some now commonplace filmmaking techniques such as location shooting and the long shot and for that, I do respect him. But, again, not being a fan of westerns, I've never felt any inclination to seek out his films since most of them are of that genre and, again, I'm not the biggest fan of John Wayne either. To sum up, what I'm saying is that I respect the both of them and the films they did are undeniably iconic of American cinema but my taste in movies doesn't gel with them.

Burt Reynolds: He may been a big sex-symbol back in his heyday and been in a lot of films that are seen as the quintessential "guy" movies like Smokey and the Bandit and the Cannonball Run movies but, not being a typical American guy, I've never seen those movies nor do I have any inclination to see them or any of Reynolds' movies. I know I sound like a broken record by this point but I'll say it again: I don't have a problem with Reynolds himself. True, he's done some less than commendable things like smacking people and stuff but nothing as bad as the stuff some of the people at the top of the list have done which have caused me to dislike them. In any case, I don't hate Reynolds. It again comes down to personal preference and me just not being interested in the movies he's famous for. I'm sure those movies are fun but they do not interest me in the slightest. So, yeah, no Burt Reynolds reviews on this blog. I'm un-American, I know.

Seth Rogen: I'll keep this one fairly short: I don't like sex comedies. I never have. I've never liked stuff such as the American Pie movies, There's Something About Mary (that movie will come up again later), or any of that stuff. Therefore, I had no interested in seeing Knocked Up, The 40-Year Old Virgin, or Superbad. I just don't find people attempting to lose their virginity to be funny. It seems like these are the only types of movies that Rogen does as well so that doesn't make him someone whose career I'm interested in following. And why the heck did they pick him to play the lead in The Green Hornet? I only saw a little bit of that movie but from what I did see, he turned the character of the Hornet into an unlikable, obnoxious asshole who constantly gives Kato crap. Why would you have him do that? I don't get it. Basically, I'm just not a fan of this guy or his brand of comedy. Take it or leave it.

Val Kilmer: If you've read my Batman Forever review, then you already have an idea of my opinion on this guy. He may have been a pretty boy back in the day (he certainly isn't now) but other than that, I don't think he ever had much going for him acting-wise. While I don't think he's out and out horrible, he's far from one of the best actors ever. I've heard that he prepares meticulously for his roles, to me, he's really wooden and bland, though not as much as another person whom we'll be getting to later in the list. Still, other than Batman Forever and The Ghost and the Darkness (the latter of which I do like a bit), I've never had any incentive to seek out this guy's films. He's just not an actor that appeals to me. Plus, I've heard he can be a major pain in the rear on movie sets so that doesn't help either. (Although, funny thing is that my dad loves him because he thought he was great as Doc Holliday in Tombstone.)

Vince Vaughn: The only movie that Vince Vaughn was in where I thought he was decent was The Lost World: Jurassic Park. He hasn't been decent since then. He absolutely crapped all over the character of Norman Bates when he attempted to play him in the pointless 1998 remake of Psycho. I cannot even begin to describe how much of a screw-up that casting choice was. Fortunately, ever since then, Vaughn has mainly stayed out of the horror genre and has stuck to both buddy- and romantic comedies. But still, while a lot of people seem to really like him in those movies, not only do I not like that genre of film but I don't think he's that good of an actor period. He's another one of those actors who has only one emotion and in his case, it's sleepy indifference. He always looks like he's about to fall asleep while he's standing up and that makes for a very boring actor to me. I don't get why so many people find him funny or why some women even find him to be all that sexy. I'm sure that he will remain popular for many years to come but he's not somebody whose career I will spend my time watching.

Mike Myers: Once again, personal preference is the reason why this guy isn't somebody who I'm that big a fan of. A big problem with me and a lot of alumni from Saturday Night Live is that I've never been a watcher of that show. I have never found it to be all that funny. I've always felt it was kind of stupid actually. I know I'm probably sounding like a humorless jerk but I have to be honest. Anyway, because of that, I never watched or cared for the Wayne's World sketch and I certainly wasn't interested in the movies. To me, it's like the John Hughes movies I talked about earlier: they're from a time and generation that I wasn't a part of (I was only five when the first Wayne's World movie came out), that I can't relate to, and I'm not interested in experiencing. (Funny thing is that there were some bits in those movies that I saw as a kid, one that involved one of them eating a frog or something and another that had one of them stabbing some little toy with a butter knife or some other utensil. In any case, those images freaked me out so much that I never wanted to see those movies or those actors ever again when I was a kid.) And that goes for the other movies that Myers has done. So I Married an Axe-Murderer? Not interested. The Austin Powers movies? Really not interested. I don't think I have to mention The Cat in the Hat. And don't get me started on Shrek. Those movies were things that I had to watch over and over again because my oldest niece was absolutely obsessed with those things when she was a toddler. When Mom babysat for her, she took over my room and would watch those movies over and over again, to the point where I never ever, ever wanted to see that green ogre or that smart-ass donkey again. So there's a big mixture of reasons why I can guarantee that I will never review anything featuring Mike Myers.

Chuck Norris: Before you say anything, I want to make it clear that I do like action movies. I know I haven't reviewed many at this point but I do (read my review of Predator if you don't believe me). But Chuck Norris has never been an action star that I've ever enjoyed. Oh, don't get me wrong. His martial arts abilities are very impressive and he could certainly mop the floor with my fat butt, even if the guy is over 70. But the thing is, his physical abilities aside, he can't act for crap. Now some may say that Arnold Schwarzenegger, whom I like very much, isn't that good of an actor either. First, I think Arnold is a better actor than people give him credit for. Second, even if you don't think he's a good actor, Arnold still has a real screen presence and charisma. So does Sylvester Stallone (although, to be fair, Stallone is an actor first and a very physically imposing guy second). Norris, in my opinion, just doesn't. He's very wooden and the only memorable thing about him in movies is how well he can fight. You never hear anybody talk about the great lines or character moments that Norris has had, unlike Arnold and Sly. Maybe it's just me but I like my action heroes to be memorable for more than just breaking or blowing stuff up. That said, I have nothing else against Norris and I deeply respect his skill in the martial arts but as an action hero, he's not my type.

Giuseppe Andrews: I don't know why I'm talking about this guy here because he could be the most least known person on this list but something about him rubs me the wrong way. I've never seen Detroit Rock City, the film that first got him some attention, (although he was apparently in Independence Day as well but I can't remember him in that), but I do remember him as a bizarre and annoying as crap deputy sheriff in Cabin Fever and ever since then, he's been somebody that I'm not too keen on. Something about him just seems off and rather unsavory. I probably shouldn't be saying this seeing as how I've never met the guy but you know when you can just sense that there's something not quite right about somebody? Well, that's the vibe I get from Andrews. It's that as well as the very bizarre films that he tends to direct. I know it's not right to judge someone based off of their work since I know for a fact that directors like John Carpenter, Wes Craven, David Cronenberg and others are actually very charming, nice people who just happen to make violent and sometimes downright weird films. But in the case of Giuseppe Andrews, his films only add to the bizarre and uncomfortable image I have of him. Maybe it's just me but he's just summon who weirds me out and, therefore, I don't really want to see anything he acts in or directs.

Pauly Shore and Dane Cook: I put these two together because for me, they represent the absolute worst when it comes to comedians: those who try really hard to cater to the lowest common denominator of humor but end up coming across as obnoxious, annoying, and ultimately unbearable. Have you ever seen that movie that Pauly Shore did called Bio-Dome? My God, he and Stephen Baldwin are unbearable in that movie! I'm assuming Shore was just as annoying in the other movies he did at that time like Son in Law, Encino Man, and In the Army Now. I said I assume because I never saw those movies. Bio-Dome was enough for me. The only compliment I can really give Shore is that he voiced the character of Bobby in A Goofy Movie and its direct-to-video sequel and I did like that character in those movies. Other than that, though, I don't think it's that big of a mystery why Shore's popularity faded fairly quickly and why he's now relegated to stand-up (he'd better hold onto that for as long as possible) and appearing in bottom of the barrel dreck like Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star. Similarly obnoxious and annoying is Dane Cook but one thing Shore has over Cook is at least he was kind of a star at one point. Cook has hardly ever had a leading role in any of the films he's been in and there's a good reason for that. Watch Simon Sez, that stupid comedy that acted in along with Dennis Rodman, and you'll see what I mean. It's absolutely cringe-inducing how annoying Cook is in that movie. He's tried to have leading roles in movies like Employee of the Month, Good Luck Chuck, and My Best Friend's Girl as well as an attempt at drama in Mr. Brooks (featuring someone else that we'll get to later on) and while these films have typically been minor successes, they're almost always critically panned. (Cook even auditioned for the lead role in Captain America: The First Avenger, which is really hilarious.) And like Carlos Mencia, Cook has been accussed of plagiarism by more than a few other comedians. My friend CK over at Deadpit.com said that he felt that Kevin James is the worst comedian ever, worse than even Cook. Despite my being a fan of Kevin James, I can at least say that he comes up with his own material, unlike Cook apparently. To sum up, I think both of these guys are unfunny losers but the good thing is that in this case, I know I'm not alone.

Alec Baldwin: Again, going on personal preference, I'm just not that into this guy or his choice of movies. I know this guy has sometimes been controversial, such as that screaming angry phone message he targeted towards his own daughter or that stupid stunt he pulled on that American Airlines flight where he refused to stop playing Words with Friends and while those incidents did make me think less of him, my opinion of him was so nonexistent beforehand that I really didn't care. Like I said, I've just never felt obligated to seek out this guy's stuff. The Hunt for Red October isn't a movie that interests me that much and neither is The Cooler. I've also never been interested in watching 30 Rock either. On top of that, this guy has been in a lot of bad movies too like The Adventures of Pluto Nash and The Cat in the Hat (the latter of which got him a Raspberry nomination for Worst Supporting Actor) so that also doesn't give me any incentive to seek him out. His acting style just doesn't grab me either. I don't what it is but I've never found him to have any type of charisma or charming humor about him. Therefore, the only way you're ever going to see me review anything featuring Baldwin is if it's of a great movie where he plays a supporting role (which he has done quite a few times so who knows?) Other than that, I'm certainly not going to review anything like The Shadow, so you're out of luck if you're a Baldwin fan.

Matthew Broderick: Broderick is a guy who, like the others before him, I don't have a problem with personally and while I grew up with The Lion King, a movie he was involved with, most of his stuff I'm not interested in. So you may ask why is he higher on the list than some of those other people? Well, it's mainly due to one film that he did which I have a personal grudge against and every time I think of Broderick, that film is the first one that comes to mind. It's the 1998 Godzilla. I'll get more into it later on since the actual director of that thing is on here as well but that film was one of the most disappointing things that I had ever experienced in my life just from the standpoint as a fan. I know I shouldn't be too angry at Broderick for that since he's only a small part of it and he didn't actually make the movie but I can't help it. Every time I see Broderick in anything, I'm reminded of that movie. Plus, even though I have nothing against Broderick personally, I don't think he's that good of an actor either. His delivery and acting just come across as really bland to me. He just seems to have one emotion and that's it. Even when he's trying to come across as angry, it's that same tone of voice. Maybe it's just me but I'm not that much of a fan of Matthew Broderick.

Alexandre Aja: If you've read a certain past review of mine, you had to know this guy was coming. Again, I don't have a problem with Aja personally. He seems like a nice enough guy and all in personality and such. I just don't like his movies. High Tension was the very first movie that I ever did as an installment of Movies That Suck because I still think that movie is an overrated piece of garbage. That often puts me in conflict with people who think that movie is awesome, like my friends over at Deadpit.com, but I stand by my opinion on that movie. However, even those who like High Tension admit that most of the movies Aja has made since then, which have, so far, all been remakes, have been very lackluster. Granted, I have not seen his first film, Furia, and I have avoided Mirrors, which seemed like another dime-a-dozen bad J-horror remake, but his remake of The Hills Have Eyes did not impress me at all, being nothing more than a virtual rehash of Wes Craven's original save for the last act. Interestingly, though, I did think Piranha 3-D was a fun, gory creature feature but other than that, he has not impressed me as a director. It's okay if you like him but for me, he's just not an inspiring filmmaker.

Kevin Smith: Now, before you tear me apart for putting this guy on the list, I just want you to know that I think those Evening with Kevin Smith specials are awesome. I love hearing this guy talk about stuff, like the crap he's gone through in Hollywood in dealing with Jon Peters while trying to develop a new Superman movie in the 90's or the ordeal he went with when he was hired to shoot a documentary on Prince that never saw the light of day. Heck, I thought the story of the botched sex tape featuring Jason Mewes he saw was hilarious. So, I like Smith as a person and as an entertainer. (Being overweight myself, I even felt for the guy when he got kicked off an airplane just because they felt he was too fat.) But, I don't care for the types of movies he makes. I know there's more to his movies that just this but a constant stream of penis and sex jokes doesn't make me laugh. I know people are going to criticize me for saying that when I just said I like his Q&A specials where he constantly makes those kinds of jokes as well as saying, "fuck" a lot (which also bugs me in movies) but here's the thing: I like hearing him saying in context with other stuff and different kinds of stories. However, I don't find it entertaining to listen to people like Ben Affleck or Jason Lee talk that way. I know that doesn't make much sense but that's the best way for me to verbalize my feelings on this. In fact, even fans of Smith's films have felt that he's been slipping in recent years so maybe it's a good thing that he's planning to retire soon. To sum up, I will always be interested in another Q&A with Smith but I'll leave his actual movies for their fans.

Mark Wahlberg: It's funny because I'm now talking about a guy that Kevin Smith royally trashed in one of those Q&A specials. Mark Wahlberg is yet another person who is a big actor and yet I don't understand why because he doesn't have much charisma at all. I thought he was okay in the movie Fear but even in that film, something just felt off about his acting. He doesn't have that many facial expressions or emotions per se and his voice just irritates me. I shouldn't talk because I'm sure my heavy Southern accented voice annoys a lot of people as well but still, something about the way Wahlberg talks just irritates me. The general consensus on his acting has been very sporadic as well. He's been acclaimed for his performances in movies like Boogie Nights (didn't he drop his pants enough when he was Marky Mark?), The Italian Job, and The Departed, which netted him an Oscar nomination, but he's also received scorn his acting in films like Max Payne and especially The Happening (What? No!) I guess with any actor, you're going to have movies where they're awesome and movies where they're not so awesome. But the point is, I'm just not a fan of Wahlberg or his acting. I know he has his admirers but I don't think he's that good. Plus, I can't really think of somebody who once dropped his pants constantly and dedicated something (I can't remember if it was a book or an album) to his dick as a serious actor. Sorry, but that's something my mind has a lot of trouble accepting.

Ridley Scott: Arguably the most critically lauded director on my list, Ridley Scott is a guy whose filmmaking style is a big example of style over substance. I will freely admit that the visuals in his films are breathtaking. I'd be a fool if I said they weren't. But that's the problem. Scott is so focused on making the visuals and art direction in his films look amazing that he pays little to no attention to the stories or the characters. To me, Alien is an extremely overrated film that may be amazing visually but it bores me to tears for the most part with a snail's pace, no tension, and characters that I couldn't care less about. And while I do find Blade Runner interesting and the visuals in it are undoubtedly groundbreaking and still look realistic to this day, it's not a movie I revisit often because of the sheer coldness and emotional detachment of the characters and the story. Now there are some directors that I like whose films are well known for being cold and clinical, like Stanley Kubrick and David Cronenberg, but I can enjoy the films of those directors or least get some food for thought of them for the most part. And I'm not saying Blade Runner didn't give me food for thought because I did find its concepts of what makes us human or what is a soul to be very interesting. But still, Scott's focusing on the visuals for the most part made me wish he had spent more time actually exploring that concept in the story and the characters rather than making it abstract. Even many of the actors who have worked with Scott will say that he's not a very good actor's director, particularly Harrison Ford, who was so ignored by his director that he hated every minute of being on the set of Blade Runner. I shouldn't pass judgment on the film before I see it but from what I can understand, Scott reached new heights of that "all visuals, no substance" way of filmmaking with Prometheus. Apart from Alien and Blade Runner, I haven't seen any of Scott's other movies. Besides the fact that I'm not his biggest fan, the reason for that is Legend, Gladiator, Thelma and Louise, and American Gangster don't interest me. I'm sure I just made some blood enemies for bashing on Ridley Scott and if you're a fan of his, that's cool but his filmmaking style just isn't for me.

David Lynch: If Ridley Scott isn't the most beloved director that I have on here, then it must be David Lynch. Like I said when I talked about Scott, I like nice visuals but I also would like a story and good characters to go with it and, like Scott, Lynch is one of those directors who goes more for visuals than putting actual emotion into his work. But whereas Scott simply renders his stories and characters cold, Lynch goes further and just makes his movies out and out weird and unrelatable. I am not a fan of surrealist movies. A bunch of weird, visual images thrown together to make a film is not my idea of a fun viewing experience. I need characters and an actual story. And I know that a director that I've said I'm a big fan of, David Cronenberg, made a Lynch-style movie in the form of Naked Lunch but guess what? That's not one of my favorite movies from him. (Neither is Crash for that matter but that's a story for another day.) I just cannot get into movies that are nothing but two hours or so of just weirdness for the sake of weirdness. As much as I love horror and science fiction, you have to give me grounding in reality, be it in the form of a character or setting I can relate to. Lynch just doesn't do that for me. Eraserhead, Lost Highway, and Mulholland Drive do nothing but confuse and freak me out, which I'm sure is the point but that's not my idea of a fun movie experience. I would like to see The Elephant Man and Blue Velvet, which sound like stuff that I can get into but other than that, David Lynch is not a director whose films you'll see me reviewing any time soon.

Tyler Perry: I should have put this guy lower on the list since, like the other people down there, his being on here is solely due to my not caring for the stuff he creates but I would have felt bad if I had put Kevin Smith higher than him because, I said, I may not like that guy's movies but I do like him as a person. That said, nothing against Tyler Perry personally. He's made a lot of money with his movies and TV shows and he has a lot of fans so he deserves to have some pride. But, his stuff just isn't my thing. The Madea character does not appeal to me and neither does that type of humor. And no, I'm not one of those people who are offended by him creating characters who are seen as buffoonish stereotypes of black people. I just don't find them funny. I'm also not that big on one actor playing multiple roles in a movie. It's fine and does show a person's range when they're able to do that but when you constantly do that in movie after movie, it gets tiresome. (I even feel that way when it comes to Eddie Murphy. It was cool in Coming To America and the Nutty Professor movies but he beat that concept to death after a while.) Perry's a millionaire because of his creations and that's great that he's living the American dream but I'm just not into his type of movies and TV.

The Twilight Cast: I absolutely despise Twilight. That is one of the worst pop-culture phenomenons to ever blight entertainment. I don't think it's romantic or touching, I just think it's overly-sappy, unbearable, and insulting to teenage girls everywhere, with some of the most unlikable protagonists ever. That said, given other circumstances, I would have put them much higher on the list. So why didn't I? Because the two leads have worked with directors that I deeply admire, either before or since Twilight. One of Kristen Stewart's first films was David Fincher's Panic Room in 2002 and Robert Pattinson has recently worked with David Cronenberg in Cosmopolis (which I haven't seen yet but I've heard Pattinson's performance is quite good) and I think is set to do another film with him as well. Because of that, I can't really say I hate them all that much. But I could care less what the other main actors like Taylor Lautner are up to now and as for Stewart and Pattinson, unless they do more work with some of my favorite filmmakers or get involved in any other movies that I'm looking forward to, I don't care that much about their next projects either.

Bruce Campbell: To start off, I am not that big of a fan of the Evil Dead series. While I do rather like Evil Dead II and I will review those movies at some point, they're hardly the horror films I go for when I'm in the mood. As for Campbell himself, I honestly didn't think he was that bad in any of those movies (again, I thought his performance in Evil Dead II was pretty good) but my problem with him is that ever since Army of Darkness, he's done nothing but ride on the coattails of that franchise. The only reason he even continues to get jobs is because he was in these beloved cult films and not because he's a good actor. He basically hasn't stopped playing Ash since Army of Darkness. With few exceptions, it's always that same smart-ass, wise-cracking persona in every movie he appears in and while that was great in those movies, it gets tiresome after a while. Plus, I can't help but frown at the behavior I've heard that Campbell displays at conventions, just being a complete smart-ass dick to people. I was at one convention that Campbell was a guest at and not only did he partake in a ridiculous thing at the convention where you would have to buy an autograph ticket just so you could be in the same room with him but he was only there for three or so hours on that one day. I know that the latter was more than likely due to his shooting schedule on the TV show Burn Notice but I still think that this speaks volumes as to where Campbell's head is at in terms of what he thinks of his fans and their devotion to them. I know that he has a lot of fans (he had an enormous line at that convention on that day) but to me, he's a schmuck who doesn't deserve this VIP treatment and shouldn't treat his fans that way.

Jerry Seinfeld: I know this guy isn't exactly a big name anymore because ever since his sitcom ended, he's gone back to doing stand-up and hasn't done much esle but I think I still should mention him. I've never found him to be that funny. His stand-up is okay and I do agree with some of the things he brings in his observational form of humor but he's never tickled my funny bone in the way comedians like Bill Cosby, Tim Allen, or Patton Oswalt have. I never thought that Seinfeld itself was that funny either. I don't like any of the characters, I found few of the episodes to be genuinely humorous, and what it eventually boils down to is that a show about nothing doesn't spike my interest. Nothing against the man himself, of course. He's just not my type of comedian. (And for those of you who are wondering, Michael Richards isn't on the list. I know some may be shocked since I've said many times that I hate any kind of biggotry and Richards showed a disturbing, racist side of himself during that Laugh Factory blow-up in 2006 but the thing is, Richards has even less of a career than Seinfeld. At least Seinfeld still has stand-up. Richards retired from stand-up after that incident so he virtually has nothing and because of that, I felt he wasn't even worth mentioning on here.)

Wrestlers Turned Actors: There are some people who should just stay in the profession that they've originally chosen for themselves and this is a big one for me. I know there is a bit of connection between wrestling and movies since wrestling is more performance art than it is an actual sport but whenever a wrestler tries to be an actor, the results are usually cringe-inducing. I think Hulk Hogan's best acting performance was as Thunderlips in Rocky III, simply because he wasn't even really playing a character. Otherwise, stuff like Suburban Commando, Mr. Nanny, and Santa With Muscles are some of the lowest common denominator dreck imaginable. And do I have to even mention Hogan Knows Best? I know that's a reality show and he's not playing a character but that was still the most bottom-of-the-barrel type of television. Dwayne Johnson, aka The Rock, has had probably the most success of any wrestler turned actor and while I admit that I kind of like his personality and enthuciasm, I'm not in a hurry to watch stuff like The Scorpion King, Doom, The Rundown, Walking Tall, and Tooth Fairy. I did like Jesse Ventura in the films he appeared in like Predator and The Running Man but he's been in little other than those films. Steve Austin sucks at acting. He just does. It's best to just give him little to no dialogue, as was the case in The Expendables. I'm also assuming that Kane really can't act since they gave him no dialogue in See No Evil and I don't think I need to say anything about John Cena's attempts at acting in films produced by WWE Studios such as The Marine and Legendary. The one wrestler turned actor whom I thought did it very well was Roddy Piper in John Carpenter's They Live. He was awesome in that movie. No other wrestler has been able to act as well as him in my opinion. Bottom line, these guys may be talented at wrestling but for the majority of them, I think they should just stick with what they're good at and leave film-acting to actual actors.

Adam Sandler: Yeah, I've never ever found this guy to be that entertaining or funny either. As I've said many times before, I have nothing against Adam Sandler personally because he seems to be a nice guy and he constantly gives his friends, such as Kevin James, David Spade, and Rob Schneider work, so that's cool. I just don't find Sandler's acting and comedy style funny. I chuckled a bit at The Water Boy, I will admit, but when you see the same schtick and formula in move after movie, it gets tiresome. How many times can we see a movie about a geeky-looking guy, who makes noises like "Ha-jee boo-goo-gee" (or however those noises he makes go), doing some dumb gags and eventually ending up with a stunningly attractive woman? (I know he's branched out and done some more dramatic stuff but I'm not interested in that either because comedians hardly ever impress me when they try to do drama.) Basically, I can't explain it further than I just don't think Sandler's brand of comedy is funny and I doubt I ever will.

Anne Heche: This is another person whom I shouldn't have even bothered putting on this list since her career is virtually non-existent now. But I decided to talk about her simply because she's such a strange individual. First and foremost, she's not a very good actor to me. I didn't think she was bad in Volcano with Tommy Lee Jones but she had absolutely no business playing Marion Crane in the remake of Psycho (that movie shouldn't have even been made to begin with but still). That performance did nothing to endear me to her and every time she pops up in a movie or a TV show now, I just roll my eyes. But now let's talk about weird a person she is. I don't make fun of people who have emotional disorders. Being somebody who suffers from Asperger's syndrome myself, I understand how miserable you can feel sometimes when something's not exactly right upstairs. But Heche showed signs of being a very disturbed person when she showed up at this poor woman's house in the middle of nowhere half-naked, walked in, stayed for half an hour, and weirded the woman out so much that she called the police. When the police arrived, Heche claimed that she was God and was going to take everyone to heaven on a spaceship. Heche later said for the first 31 years of her life, she was insane because of the abuse inflicted upon her by her father when she was a kid and in order to cope with it, created a fantasy world and an alter ego where she was not only the half-sister of Jesus Christ but was also an alien. I'm not making fun of Heche because she was abused and it damaged her mind. I would never think to do that. Still, even though she's supposedly okay nowadays, that stuff makes you wonder about what was going on in her head when she's onscreen, particularly in the films she did before her meltdown. I know it's not right to judge her because of that but I still find it off-putting and it sort of inhibits my ability to enjoy someone's work. I will always like Volcano but other than that, I won't be following the rest of Heche's career any time soon.

Takashi Miike: If you remember way back when to my one hundreth post on this blog, I discussed the fact that, despite my love of the horror genre, there are some films that are just too extreme for to take. Those included films like A Serbian Film, the August Underground movies, The Girl Next Door and others. I don't know if I said this or not in the actual post but the horror films of this guy do fall into that category for me. I know Miike has a lot of admirers and I'm also aware that, in a career that spans over twenty years and encompasses over seventy films, he has made many other films besides Audition and Ichi the Killer but those are the types of films I can't take. The little bit of Audition that I saw on Bravo's 100 Scariest Movie Moments was hard enough for me to stomach so I can't imagine watching the entire film and the same goes for the brief bit I saw of Ichi the Killer. On top of that, the other stuff that I've just simply heard that goes on in those movies doesn't make me want to watch them either. I did enjoy One Missed Call but other than that, I don't think I'll ever see Miike's other horror films. I will say though, that even if I can't take it, somebody who has the balls to push the envelope like Miike does has to be admired. Case in point: Imprint, his episode of the Showtime series Masters of Horror, was so messed up that they couldn't even show it and that was on cable! So, while I may not be able to stomach his movies, I do admire the man for not shying away from stuff that most other filmmakers would.

Paul Reubens: I hate the character of Pee-wee Herman with a fiery passion. You know how I talked about how much Pauly Shore and Dane Cook irritate the living crap out of me? Well, put those two together (in fact, throw in the most annoying of Adam Sandler for good measure), crank the annoying factor up to ten, and you'll know how much I can't stand Pee-wee Herman. I plan on doing a Directors section on Tim Burton one day and I can tell you right now that Pee-wee's Big Adventure will be absent from it. Basically, everything about that character just pisses me off, from the way he talks and acts to his mannerisms and his psychedelic playhouse. I'm all for kids' programming being more than just what it typically is but that show was just too much for me. And yet, for all my hatred of the character, I don't have a problem with Paul Reubens himself. He created a character that caught on and as long as it was making him money, he had every right to ride that wagon until the wheels came off. I'm also not against him pleasuring himself while sitting in a porn theater. Heck, I thought that's what people did when they went into porn theaters anyway. Also, he wasn't bothering anyone and you would think that the public would understand that he isn't really Pee-wee Herman so I think the outrage over that incident was blown out of proportions. The thing is, I don't hate Reubens. I think he's just an entertainer who got a bit of a raw deal and was treated unfairly because he was identified so he closely with his most famous character. I just really cannot take the character that he created, no matter how insanely popular it was at one time. But, I would not be against him having a comeback at all. I wouldn't even mind if his comeback involved Pee-wee Herman... just as long as I'm not forced to watch it.

Brett Ratner and McG: Like Pauly Shore and Dane Cook, I put these two directors together because to me, they're two prime examples of the worst of fast food-style, uninvolving directors who make movies for no reason other than to please the masses and the studios in order to make money. Also, they're two huge examples of music video directors who think that just because they've done a few of those, they can move onto actual movies. Every once in a while, you get a music video director who becomes an actual filmmaker, like David Fincher, but the majority of them become like these guy and just make by-the-numbers dreck. None of Brett Ratner's films interest me in the slightest. I couldn't care less about the Rush Hour movies. I'm sure they are fun but they don't appeal to me. I've never been interested in the characters of the X-Men period so I had no desire to see any of those movies, including the third one that Ratner directed. If someone asks about Tower Heist, my reply would be, "Are you kidding?" The only film of his I'm interested in is Red Dragon, mainly just so I can say I've seen all the Hannibal Lecter films (though I'm not expecting it to be anywhere near the level of Manhunter) but other than that, you can keep Ratner's films. For me, however, McG is even worse. For those of you out there who do enjoy those Charlie's Angels movies, that's fine, but can anybody really call those things serious attempts at filmmaking? (Supposedly, Bill Murray hated working with McG so much that he refused to return for the second film.) They're just so generic to me. And why was McG put in charge of Terminator: Salvation? Despite Arnold's absence, that still had the potential to be a good film but McG turned it into an okay but extremely muddled film, with an uninspired performance by Christian Bale. Its being toned down to a PG-13 didn't help either. Bottom line, I know a lot of people have been entertained by the movies of these guys and I have nothing against that but I personally just prefer a little more from my entertainment.

John Waters: This guy is here simply because the movies he makes really aren't my type. Like the people who were lower on the list, I have nothing against Waters personally because he comes across as a friendly, likable persona. But I cannot bring myself to watch the movies that he makes simply because they're absolutely disgusting. I know that's the point, that they're trash cinema, and I hope I'm not sounding like ultra-conservative Roger Ebert on here but still, that's not the kind of stuff that I like to see when I watch movies. When I watched the Cinema Snob episode on Pink Flamingos, I nearly lost my lunch at some of the stuff in that film and Brad Jones couldn't even show all of it! I saw bits of another movie of his, it could have been A Dirty Shame, in a documentary called This Film Is Not Yet Rated and that was also pretty hard to take. I know Waters is a beloved cult director and that's cool but, even given some of the stuff that I've watched, his brand of filmmaking is one that I just can't get into or stomach.

Josh Hartnett: When my friend Jeff Burr (director of Leatherface: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre III) and I got together one time to shoot the breeze for a few hours at a coffee shop, the conversation at one point came to the movie 30 Days of Night. If you've read my review, you'd know that movie did nothing for me in the slightest except for some pretty visuals. One of the biggest reasons I didn't like that movie was because of Josh Hartnett's performance or rather lack thereof. When I told Jeff that, he said that he had no idea who told Hartnett that he was a movie star and I couldn't agree with that more. A lot of people give Ben Affleck crap for having a lack of personality (and while I do agree that Affleck isn't the best actor, I kind of like him so I didn't put him on this list) but to me, Hartnett makes Affleck look like Marlon Brando by comparison. Hartnett is another in that long line of pretty boy actors whose extreme good looks offset their being very wooden with little to no charisma (Hayden Christensen being the absolute worst of that bunch but that guy's career is so non-existent now that I didn't even bother putting him on here). He was okay in his first film, Halloween H2O, but ever since then, he's been nothing but an extremely boring actor, especially when he's given the lead. Go watch 30 Days of Night and try to tell me that you were at all invested in his character or the conflict involving him and his ex-wife. I would bet money you wouldn't be able to do it. I would think one of the essentials when becoming an actor is the ability to actually emote. Hartnett can't do that to save his life. I hope you'll forgive me if you're a fan of Hartnett but if I could, I would send him a letter saying, "Please retire from acting. Just stop. You're not good at it at all. Every time I see one of your movies, I die a little inside. Either go back to the Actor's Studio and really hone your craft or just retire!"

James Belushi: He may be the brother of the late John Belushi but he didn't receive any of his brother's talent. James Belushi is one of the most unfunny "comedians" I've ever seen because of one thing: he brings nothing new or unique to the table at all. His comedic timing, the way he tells jokes, and sets up punchlines is so average and uninspired that it's even more cringe-inducing than if he were out and out horrible. While I don't think According to Jim was as horrible a sitcom as most people make it out to be, it's hardly something I go out of my way to watch (although, Courtney Thorne-Smith is pretty hot). And the only movie of his I've ever been interested in watching is Red Heat and that's just for Arnold Schwarzenegger. Otherwise, I could give a crap less about any of his other movies and I know most other people feel the same way. (Does anybody care about a Turner and Hooch-style movie with him in place of Tom Hanks?) For my money, James Belushi is somebody who's only had a career because of his family name. If it wasn't for that, nobody would have ever cared about him. And, what do you know? Nowadays, few people could care less about him anyway. (I was going to put him higher on the list because he purportedly refused to sign an autograph for a sick eight-year old, something that I find to be very reprehensible. But since the only person who's ever told that story is David Cross, I decided not to take it into account. I'm not saying Cross is lying but since it's only his word, there's no way to prove it either.)

Steven Seagal: Like the other action stars I've mentioned beforehand, I was never really a fan of Steven Seagal for the very same reasons I stated with Jean-Claude Van Damme and Chuck Norris: I never felt he had any kind of charisma or real talent to him. He always had the same expression frozen on his face and he never made me feel for him in any of the movies he was in. So why is higher on crap list than those other guys, you may ask? Because, even though I never cared for his movies, at least the guy seemed he was making the effort with his martial arts skills and the fight scenes. As an out of shape slob, I deeply respect anybody who keep themself in great shape and masters any sort of martial art. But then, when his career started to slide towards nothing but direct to DVD movies, Seagal stopped caring completely. He became a fat sack of crap who relied on a double for the majority of his fight scenes. I know Seagal isn't a young man anymore but still, if you want to continue to be an action star and you know martial arts, make the effort. But that's not the worst of how lazy Seagal has become. There are moments in his direct to DVD movies where Seagal will speak and it's not even his voice but that of a dub actor. This guy is so lazy that he can't even get his fat ass into an ADR booth to re-record some lines! If Seagal himself doesn't care, then why should his fans? I'm not even a fan of the guy and I'm annoyed at the sheer lack of caring on his part. Plus, I've always hard that Seagal is a real jerk. Maybe he's lightened up in recent years but there are a lot of stories of him just being a pompous prick about things. I was at a convention one time where Lance Henriksen told a hilarious story about how on one movie, Seagal said that a scene wouldn't need a second take, even though he wasn't the director. Apparently, Seagal was a real dick. He better not be nowadays, though, because he has absolutely no right. Seagal is just a shmuck to me.

Tracy Morgan: I find this guy to be just as obnoxious as the character of Pee-wee Herman, perhaps even more so. My God, how can anybody find him funny? All he does is yell and scream in that way that just grates on you to no end. He's the reason why I stopped watching Scare Tactics on Sci-Fi Channel. Shannen Doherty may be a bitch in real life but at least she was nice to look at during the intro sequences of each prank and wasn't obnoxious as crap. Morgan, on the other hand, is insufferable. Not only is he hard to take in movies and on TV but in real life as well. Besides being so annoying that you just want to smack him and scream, "Shut up!" he's also insensitive to other people's feelings and constantly runs his mouth off about touchy subjects and ends up getting himself in trouble. He's not only made very inexcusable remarks about homosexuals but what offended me even more was the stuff he said about "retarded kids." Now, I agree with the consensus that people nowadays are way too uptight about stuff but that was crossing the line in my opinion. Morgan needs to think about what he's going to say before he says it; otherwise, he's not going to be popular for very long. So, I do not like Tracy Morgan at all. He's a prime example of the most insufferable type of comedian in my opinion.

Roseanne Barr: Two words sum up Roseanne Barr for me: loud and obnoxious (I was also going to put in fat and ugly but I figured that would be a little too mean-spirited). She may have had one of the most successful sitcoms ever and I know it had a lot of fans but both that show and the comedian herself I find to be nothing but unpleasant. She just comes across like an absolute bitch, both in real life and in that show. I know the concept was for her to play a realistic, strong woman who wasn't a victim of patriarchal consumerism but I still found the character of Roseanne Connor to be a hateful, horrible woman with a really messed up family. (The only thing that makes that show even the tiniest bit watchable for me is John Goodman but that's just because I like him in general.) As for the real woman, I'm fully aware that Roseanne had a pretty difficult upbringing, with her parents wanting to keep their Jewish heritage secret from their neighbors, her parents supposedly sexually abusing her (though Roseanne herself admits she was really messed up when she made that statement so who knows how much of that is true), and her being caught in a traffic accident when she was a teenager that caused brain damage and drastically changed her behavior. So, I do feel for her in that respect. But that doesn't mean have to like her as a person. What I'm saying is that she may be loved by a lot of people but her personality and comedy-style just rub me the wrong way. (And in case you're wondering, I don't hate her for butchering the National Anthem at that baseball game back in 1990 for two reasons. One, I'm not a fan of sports to begin with so it didn't matter to me. Second, I thought it was hilarious to see how badly she butchered that song, which isn't easy to sing anyway. I don't mean any offense to the National Anthem itself, I just thought that footage was really funny.)

Lindsay Lohan: I really hate kicking someone when they're not only down but at rock-bottom. God knows, Lindsay Lohan has hit that level many times. I don't even think she's that bad of an actor. Granted, movies like Mean Girls, The Parent Trap, Freaky Friday, and Herbie: Fully Loaded aren't what I lean towards for entertainment, including when I want to watch something from Disney, but she certainly wasn't bad in those movies. So why did I put her on here? Because, despite her serious personal problems, it's kind of hard for me to have pity on someone who's been given chance after chance after chance to get straightened and every time, has blown it. I know drug and alcohol addiction is hard to kick but when you keep relapsing over and over again, there has to be something else to it, like a lack of really wanting to get sober. That's my next point. After a while, it seemed like she didn't eve care anymore, with how she constantly violated her probations, missing mandatory hearings and classes, and even tried to steal some jewelry at one point. And you know why she doesn't seem to care anymore? Because every single damn time she's put in jail, they've let her out! She only spends like half of her sentences, if that, whenever she's put in jail and to me, that's sending her the message that she can do whatever she wants and she'll still get away with it. If you want her to understand why she has to clean up her act, forcing her to do the time would probably help a lot! And by the way, her parents suck. Her mother is a fame-hungry shrew who refuses to take responsibility for the life she's allowed her daughter to lead and just wants to cash in on her fame and her father is just crazy. That must make it difficult on her and therefore, everything she does isn't exactly her fault but still, she's the one who has continued to mess her life up constantly. So, until Lohan cleans up her act for real and gets it pounded into her head that she's heading for disaster if she doesn't, I'm not going to be all that sympathetic towards her as cruel as that sounds.

Ray Romano: I know I'm bashing on a lot of popular comedians here but to be honest, I genuinely dislike this guy more than the other comedians I've mentioned up to this point. Everything about this guy annoys the crap out of me, be it his mopey expressions and demeanor or the annoying, nasally droning way he talks. I just can't stand that stuff. And I hate Everybody Loves Raymond with a passion. Those characters are horrible people! I know I've said before that I like The King of Queens and yeah, the characters on that show aren't exactly upstanding citizens either, but I find them funny.  I don't find anybody on this show funny. Ray Barone is a beaten down pussy of a man who won't stand up for anything; Debra is a complaining, angry, and genuinely unpleasant person; Marie Barone is a controlling, manipulative old bitch; Frank is an asshole; and Robert is a big, whiny baby whose constant complaining of, "Whaa, Mommy likes Raymond more than me!" just makes me want to smack him. Just man up and go about your business. Stop crying like a baby! It's probably just me but I don't get how that show became one of the most beloved sitcoms of all time. I don't. Even worse is that Romano appeared in a couple of episodes of The King of Queens and those particular episodes I avoid like the plague except for one because I do think it's funny but not because of him. (Though, to be fair, I do realize that without his friendship with Romano and his appearances on Everybody Loves Raymond, Kevin James may not have gotten his own sitcom.) Yeah, not a fan of Ray Romano or his show.

Keanu Reeves: Few people dissuade me from watching a movie more than this guy. It amazes me that he is as big of a star as he is because I think he is one of the worst actors that has ever lived. He is the epitome of wooden, with no changes in emotion whatsoever be it in his voice or facial expressions. Speaking of his voice, it always has that same surfer dude-like sound to it no matter what character he's playing. That makes it really bad when he's cast as an English character in films like Bram Stoker's Dracula and Much Ado About Nothing (both of which he did back to back, I might add). You can just hear that sound behind his attempt at an English accent. I find him so boring that, as I said, I will not watch anything with him in it. I know I'm missing out on some really popular movies like Speed, The Matrix, The Devil's Advocate, and The Gift but I refuse to watch them because I just cannot stand Reeves. The only reason I watched Bram Stoker's Dracula is because I hoped that film's ensemble cast would overshadow his awful acting but even without him, I still wouldn't have liked that movie (see the review for my reasons). And the Bill & Ted movies I just don't care about at all. In closing, don't expect to see any other movies starring Reeves reviewed on this blog.

Kevin Costner: It was hard for me to decide whether I disliked this guy or Keanu Reeves more but the more I think about it, the more I realize that Costner deserves to be a bit higher. Why? Whereas Reeves bores me to death with his poor acting, Costner bores me with both his poor acting and his overdone, tedious way of directing. That makes him a double threat in my book. Like Reeves, Costner puts little-to-no emotion in his voice and facial expressions when he's acting but even worse is when he gets behind the camera. You know you're in for a boring, bland, tedious long movie when Costner is in the director's chair. Never mind the fact that I don't like the type of movie it is anyway, Dances With Wolves is, above everything else, a long and excruciating watch. I know that grabbed a lot of people but not me. And leave us not forget Waterworld, one of the most expensive and overhyped flops ever made. Honestly, the only film that I thought Costner was halfway decent in was Clint Eastwood's A Perfect World but for me, that movie is good because of Eastwood, not Costner. Maybe Costner has been good in some other movies but his track record has not made me eager to seek out anything else involving him save for something where he has a very small supporting role. I'm sure Costner is a nice guy in reality but as an actor and director, I just think he's boring.

The Farrelly Brothers: This one comes down to just personal preference. Before anybody says that I don't have a sense of humor, let me assure you that I do. I just don't like the type of humor that these guys specialize in. I laugh at fart jokes, mind you, and I do love slapstick but that type of gross-out humor, like the infamous scene in There's Something About Mary or the part in Dumb and Dumber where they're shooting ketchup and mustard up into their mouths and the like, just isn't my thing. I know they don't like it when it's referred to as "gross out" humor but they better learn to suck it up because that's what it is. I'm not trying to sound snobbish, I just don't like that type of humor. On top of that, being a fan of The Three Stooges, I was really worried when I heard that they were going to do a movie based on them because that type of humor is not what the Stooges were known for or what made them great. (For the record, I have not seen that movie yet but I've heard that it wasn't that bad.) I'm not trying to be a snob and if you enjoy the Farrelly Brothers' movies, that's fine, but their movies just aren't for me.

Uwe Boll: You probably saw this one coming the minute you read the title of this post. Now, I do get enjoyment out of watching bad movies. Besides the fact that they can be fun, movies from directors like Ed Wood and Larry Buchanan have a real charm to them. Despite the poor quality of the acting, story, and special effects, you get the feeling that these guys tried, damn it, because they liked making movies. I don't get that vibe with Uwe Boll. First off, his movies are so awful that they're not fun. They're mind-numbing, retarded garbage. But then there's the fact that Boll is deluded to the nth degree and thinks that he's a great filmmaker. Now, Ed Wood genuinely thought that he was a good director as well but he wasn't anywhere close to being as obnoxious about as Boll is. Boll is another in a long line of annoying directors who refuse to take any criticism for their movies and when their films do great criticized, they act completely immature and unprofessional. The stuff that Boll does, however, shows how deluded he is. He has referred to critics who have trashed his movies as retards and said that another critic didn't understand anything about movies, was an untalented wannabe filmmaker with no balls, and even said that the guy has sex with his mom. Boll has gotten onto game companies for not showing any support for the movie adaptations he makes of their games (maybe that's because you have the worst track record of making video game movies and you've even admitted that you don't play video games in the first place, you moron!) There was that ridiculous stunt where he challenged his detractors to a boxing match, as if that would prove anything, and from what I hear, Boll lied to a lot of the contestants and lured them into a trap so he could really beat the crap out of them when he said that it was all for PR. He also once challenged Michael Bay to a boxing match as well as after Bay responded to a dumb publicity stunt where Boll called him a retard and proclaimed himself the only genius in the movie business. He did so in order to, as Boll himself said, see who was the better director. I'm not a fan of Michael Bay either, as you'll see later on, but I'm like, "Dude, are you really that stupid that you think beating people at boxing is going to prove anything?" Boll even said he would retire if a petition begging him to do so got one million signatures but he went back on his word, saying that if it had happened within the first two months of that petition being up, he would have retired but he's not doing so now. I think that shows that he knows there are a lot of people who hate him and he's now doing this, including continuing to make movies, just to piss them off. I'm like, "For God's sake, man, you're over forty and you're acting like a spoiled teenager. You should make movies just because you want to, not to get back at your detractors and you also shouldn't be insulting people who don't like your stuff." So, it's not just the fact that Boll makes bad movies that's put him on the list. It's just that he's another pompous prick who can't take any criticism whatsoever.

Gus Van Sant: How can such a lauded filmmaker be so ignorant and stupid about certain things? I don't know but somehow, Gus Van Sant accomplishes it. Van Sant is another one of those arthouse filmmakers who tends to make the type of movies that I'm not interested in. I'm sure Good Will Hunting and Finding Forrester (the latter of which always seemed like another version of the former and I wasn't too surprised to find they had the same director) are great movies but neither of them interest me. Milk kind of interests me but I'm not in a hurry to see it. And I'm definitely not interested in seeing Gerry because, from what I understand, that movie is nothing but Matt Damon and Casey Affleck walking through a desert and for the most part, nothing whatsoever happens. How is that supposed to be entertaining? I don't care if it's supposed to be full of symbolism or whatever, movies are supposed to be entertainment and there is nothing entertaining about two guys walking through the desert! Just stupid. But the main reason Van Sant is on here is because he made one of the most pointless movies imaginable with the 1998 remake of Psycho. All he did was copy the film shot for shot, with the same script, dialogue, and camera angles, except with actors of lesser caliber in regards to Vince Vaughn and Anne Heche. Van Sant's reasons for doing so were beyond retarded. One, he felt that if you're going to do a remake, you shouldn't change anything. Then what's the point? The point of doing a remake is tell a story through a different perspective, not just photocopy it and only change a few things here and there. Two, he said that plays are reinterpretted on the stage all the time with different actors so why should his version of Psycho be any different? Maybe that's because movies and plays are two different things. If that was the case, then there would be dozens and dozens of shot for shot remakes of famous films. Third, he said that it had never been done before. There's a reason for that, you know. Because it's stupid and pointless. And finally, in an attempt to explain how his film is a bit different from the original, Van Sant said that he relied upon his cast to flesh out the other characters more than they were in the original. How is that possible when you gave them the exact same dialogue, character motivations, and scenes? Basically, that film and Van Sant's explanation of it says to me that he's an idiot who's dressed himself up as an arthouse filmmaker. Hopefully that film taught him to stick with the stuff he knows and never remake anything again.

Joaquin Phoenix: I understand that some people are very eccentric. God knows, I'm not exactly normal myself. But Joaquin Phoenix takes the weird method actor concept a little too far for my tastes. While he's considered a brilliant actor, I just find the way he acts outside of his roles to be strange for the sake of being strange. Nobody likes the media or the papparazzi but when an interviewer is simply asking you questions about your latest movie and not prying into your personal life, you shouldn't be standoffish or weird towards them, as Phoenix was to one female interviewer by saying something like, "I doubt you try ver hard) or to another guy whom he asked on the red carpet if he had a giant frog growing out of his head. Was that really called for? Once they get too personal, then you can get snippy. Otherwise, quit being a dick. And do I even need to get into that I'm Still Here thing? I know it was all a hoax and was just promotion for that mockumentary but was it necessary to go around and freak people out by acting completely crazy, going as far as to appear on David Letterman while acting psychotic? I don't understand at all what Phoenix was trying to accomplish with that hoax. After the smoke had cleared, people paid little attention to the film that came out of it and were mainly looking at him as a bigger freak than they already thought he was. And even if he hadn't done that stuff, people would probably have still looked at the film and just scratched their heads over it, wondering if Phoenix had lost mind. Either way, that film only further mystified people about Phoenix. I'm sure the guy still has fans and he will continue to get roles but to me, he's just a weirdo whom I don't feel comfortable watching.

Sacha Baron Cohen: My resentment towards this man is two-fold. One is the very simple fact that I find his movies to be unwatchable because they're repulsive, unpleasant, and downright offensive in terms of the stereotypes he plays, whether they be racial like Borat or homosexual as in Bruno. I just find it impossible to laugh at something so extreme. It makes my skin crawl more than anything else. But I also have a bone to pick with how he treats the people who appear in his movies, especially with the Borat movie. I know I got all over Jaoquin Phoenix for playing a bizarre and not so funny hoax on all of America but to me, Cohen went one step farther during the making of Borat, making fools out of a bunch of innocent and unsuspecting people in the film who had know idea what they were getting themselves into. I know the participants signed a release form where they agreed not to take any legal action for defamation of character or fraud but still, some of the crap Cohen apparently put them through is unbelievable. Like the woman whom he apparently got fired from her job at a TV station or various people and organizations that Cohen and the filmmakers made idiots out of or made look bad, like the villagers in one small Romanian area. There was also a person who claimed Cohen, as Borat, harrassed him in a bathroom and he didn't sign any of those aforementioned release forms. Now, as with most allegations, there's no hard physical evidence to prove a lot of this stuff and I know there have been a lot of controversial movies but I can't recall any movie that had these kinds of allegations or so many of them for that matter. When all of this stuff piles up, it's hard to ignore. So, not only do I find both his movies and characters disgusting but the way he apparently does things makes me look down on him even more.

Tom Cruise: I know I'm about to bash on one of the biggest stars from the late 80's on into the 2000's but it's the truth: I don't like Tom Cruise. Now, here's the thing. I don't have a problem with his acting. I don't think he's one of the best actors ever but I don't think he's awful either. I'm sure a lot of the movies that he's been in are very entertaining as well. Heck, for most of my life, I didn't even really have an opinion on the guy. But, from 2005 onward, he's done stuff that I just cannot condone. I don't have a problem with scientology. I don't understand it but I feel that people are entitled to their own personal beliefs. Whatever you feel is the truth, great! Continue to think that. However, what I do have a problem with is when you try to force your beliefs on everyone else. The crap that Cruise did to Brooke Shields that year, criticizing her for taking anti-depressants in order to cope with post-partum depression (speaking personally, the anti-depressant that she took, Paxil, is the same that I take and it works well enough for me) was bad enough but then, his getting into a ridiculous debate with Matt Lauer on Today when they should have been talking about War of the Worlds and then having the balls to call psychiatry a pseudoscience made my opinion of him drop even further. I'm not even going to get into the whole thing with Katie Holmes but I don't think that her separating from him behind his back is a coincidence. I know there are a lot of people out there who still like Cruise (although his popularity has slid in recent years) but he's just too crazy for me to endorse his work in good conscience.

Gilbert Gottfried: He may have been the voice of Iago in Disney's Aladdin franchise, a franchise that I do like for the most part, but I never really cared for that character nor the man behind him. It's ironic that Gottfried's voice has turned up in so many films meant for children because if you know anything about the man, he's hardly kid-friendly. In any case, he's another person who's very voice and persona just drives me nuts. That loud voice of his is just so obnoxious and grating that I can't believe that he was ever really popular at one time. Every time he pops up in a movie or a TV show, I just roll my eyes and start rubbing my temples. (My dad hates him about as much as I do.) Plus, he's proved that he's a real douchebag as well, something which I wasn't that surprised to learn. First, he makes a 9/11 joke just three weeks after it happened and then, in 2011, he made Twitter jokes about the devastating earthquake in Japan just days after that happened, the latter of which got him fired from being the voice of the Aflac duck. I know some comedians' shtick is that they're very raunchy and un-PC but to me, there's a difference between that and being an insensitive jerk. (Case in point with two other guys who will be coming up later.) And the way he apologized after the earthquake joke, saying, "My thoughts are with the victims and their families" just made go, "Oh, shut up! You're only saying that because you got yourself in hot water over it." Some people should have a little more sense about stuff like that and therefore, they wouldn't have to back-pedal like crazy when they get people pissed off at them and make themselves look even worse as a result. Basically, I wasn't a fan of Gottfried before that and I'm certainly not one now. You may think me overly sensitive but I just don't like assholes and for me, Gottfried proved that he is one.

Michael Bay: It's almost redundant for me to bash Michael Bay since, despite most mainstream critics constantly giving him crap, his movies have grossed billions and billions of dollars world-wide. Still, I have to put my two cents in on him because remember when I said earlier that directors like Brett Ratner and McG were two prime examples of the very type of director that I hate? Well, as bad as they are, Bay is, by far, the epitome of that. I've said it once and I'll say it again: I don't mind movies that are meant to be nothing more than fun, fast-paced, popcorn movies. But to me, directors like Bay take that concept, turn it up to the nth degree, and the results are overblown, jumbled messes of movies that have a lot of action and flashy effects but you don't know what the point of it all is because the stories are either incoherent or nonexistent and the characters are so rudimentary that they might as well just be cardboard cut-outs. The reason why I put Bay higher than those previously mentioned directors who do the same thing is because of the additional slaps in the face it feels like the guy gives you when you watch one of his movies. First, I don't know why they keep giving Bay the keys to beloved 80's cartoon franchises. I never watched Transformers as a kid but I didn't need to know that the live-action movies that Bay's made have little to do with it. Why would you take a beloved franchise like that, promise a multi-million dollar budget live-action movie of it, and then change it so drastically that you might as well not even give it the same name? Hell, these Transformers movies don't even star the Transformers! They star Shia LaBeouf as a thoroughly unlikable, asshole teenager who's thrown into the war between the Autobots and Decepticons when he should not even be a factor. But not only did Bay screw up Transformers but, after being given the role of producer to a purported new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles film, he announced that the turtles in the film would be from an alien race. Again, why is he taking a beloved franchise like that and just crapping on it, knowing full well that fans are going to be angry? Second, there's all the unnecessary and, in some cases, downright uncomfortable bits of humor that he throws into his movies, particuarly the Transformers movies. The characters Skids and Mudflap in Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen; Shia LaBeouf's sex-obsessed parents in those movies (not to mention the two dogs humping in the second one, which you see not once but twice); John Turturro in a thong or something like that in the second movie; the character of Jerry "Deep" Wang in the third film and on and on. Comic relief can be a good thing but Bay goes way too far and makes it not only intrusive but in some cases, downright offensive. Third, you have not only the racial stereotypes that I've already mentioned, like Skids and Mudflap, but also the crap Bay does with women in his movie like the closeups of Megan Fox's butt in those Transformers movies as well as how, in the third one, a shot of the moon at the beginning dissolves to a shot of a woman's butt. Does Bay just have no shame whatsoever? Finally, Bay just comes across as a complete douchebag and seems unwilling to accept criticism from anybody, even from his own actors, like when swung at one actor (albeit playfully) during the making of Armageddon and told to just shut up and do his job when said actor (I can't remember who it was) questioned the validity of the movie's story. I know since he's making these type of movies that scientific inaccuracies and stuff are commonplace and really aren't important but still, he doesn't have to be such a jerk whenever he's criticized. I've been going on about this guy for a long time so I better wrap this up. All I can say is that Michael Bay may be an extremely successful director commercially but his films are too run-of-the-mill, overbloated, junkfood-style, and, ultimately, dumb for me to enjoy.

Roland Emmerich: I debated on whether to put Michael Bay or this guy higher on the list and, ultimately, I went with Roland Emmerich since my reason for hating this guy is very much a personal one. Emmerich has been on my shit-list ever since the summer of 1998, when he raped the name of probably my favorite character in any media: Godzilla. I have been a huge Godzilla fan ever since I was a little kid and when I heard there was going to be a big budget, American-made film, I got very, very excited. However, what I got was not a movie about Godzilla. Instead, I got a movie about a mutated iguana that looked like an oversized T-Rex who runs from the military, doesn't breathe fire, lays eggs that basically hatch the Velociraptors from Jurassic Park, and is taken out by a few missiles to the neck while being caught in the suspension cables to the Brooklyn Bridge. The movie itself was bad enough but Emmerich's attitude towards Godzilla in general ticked me off. I don't mind that he doesn't like the character. Nobody is going to be a fan of everything. But his apathy towards the fans as well as their reasons for not liking his film are what really get to me. He just comes across as so arrogant when talking about it that it just pisses me off to no end. In any case, other than that very personal reason, another reason for my not liking Emmerich is that all he does is make the same type of movie over and over again: they're all just overbloated disaster movies with way too many characters, stupid attempts at humor, and really awful CGI. The only film of his that I can say I enjoy is Independence Day but that's mainly for Will Smith. Other than him, the action sequences, and some nice effects work, the movie is still pretty bad and I care for little of the other actors in it (even Jeff Goldblum, whom I normally like, is really bad in that movie in my opinion). I don't mind Emmerich trying to make fun popcorn movies to watch in the summer but couldn't he change the formula every now and then? Bottom line, I don't like this guy and I highly doubt that he will ever make another movie that I even half-way enjoy.

Spike Lee: This guy is on here not because I don't like his movies but because he's an egomaniac who won't keep his mouth shut. As I've said many times before, I'm not racist in the slightest. I've gotten into nasty arguements with members of my family who won't admit it but are prejudiced themselves. So, I'm all for equal rights. But I also don't like someone who thinks that just because they're of a race other than Caucasian, they can cause trouble and try to say that there's racism where there is none. Lee has done that so many times that it's hard to keep count. He got all over Clint Eastwood for not putting black marines in the two films he directed about Iwo Jima, even though there are black marines seen in many scenes. Besides, while there were black soldiers involved in the battle for Iwo Jima, they were mainly restricted to defensive positions as well as ammo supply and weren't involved in the major parts of the battle. There's a good reason Eastwood told Lee to shut his face: the guy doesn't know what he's talking about. Lee also once said that basketball player Larry Bird was overrated simply because he's white. He said that with the "white media" praising him so much, you'd think nobody had ever played basketball before him, despite the fact that I'm pretty sure the "white media" has praised black players like Michael Jordan, Charles Barkley, Patrick Ewing, and others in the past for their talent. I'm not going to get into the political controversies he's gotten into like calling Senator Trent Lott a Ku Klux Klan after comments Lott made about Senator Strom Thurmond's failed presidential bid or his feelings that the government ignored the plight of African-Americans during Hurricane Katrina. I try to stay out of talking about anything political because you simply cannot win. But, lastly, I will talk about what I think is proof of Lee's enormous ego: his injunction against Spike TV for using the name "Spike." Why? Because he felt that since he's so famous, people would think he was associated with the network. How much of a high opinion of yourself do you have to have to think that? You know, Lee, you may be a fairly well known filmmaker but it's not like you're so super-popular that people associate you with any use of the name Spike. To end, I may get hated on for some of the stuff I've said here but I still feel that Spike Lee is an egomaniac who needs to shut up and stop trying to cause trouble everywhere he goes.

Eli Roth: My hatred for this shmuck is two-fold. One is that I think his movies suck big-time. Cabin Fever is a boring, stupid piece of trash whose main characters are some of the most unlikable ever. The same goes for the Hostel movies. I've never been a fan of the "torture porn" subgenre simply because I don't understand the enjoyment of watching people suffer, even more so when, again, it's people that you don't care about. So I hate the guy's movies first of all. But the other reason I hate him is because of his unwavering, bloated opinion of himself. Roth thinks that every single piece of film that he creates is a masterpiece of cinema and you'd better realize it. He refuses to take any criticism whatsoever for his films, including in interviews and the like. When Hostel Part II (which he claimed would have the most shocking ending ever I might add) died at the box-office in 2007, he blaimed it on illegal downloading and piracy instead of on the possibility that people just plain didn't like the movie. He also has a tendency to do four or five audio commentaries for any of his movies on the DVD's. Do you really like watching your movies and congratulating yourself on how awesome you are that much? He's also shown what a big baby he is in other ways, such as when he apparently threw a fit when he wasn't allowed inside of a Fangoria award ceremony for free. On top of that, people who used to work with Roth but have since split from him have described him as a "spoiled rich kid." It's bad enough for someone to constantly make bad movies but when you're so obnoxiously arrogant about your perceived filmmaking abilities and won't take any criticism, that makes you an unlikable putz who needs to be put in his place. Somebody needs to do that with Roth. And what the hell does Quentin Tarantino see in him in anyway?

Paris Hilton: I could just smack this bitch, I hate her so much. I've hated her longer than I hate most of the things I do hate. I cannot stand this trend of people who are famous for being famous, who gain notoriety not because of any talent that they have but because they come from a rich family and lead a crazy lifestyle. The only reason anybody knows who she is because her family is extremely rich and because of that sex tape. If it weren't for that, nobody would give two craps about her. I also hate her attitude that because she's rich, she can do whatever she wants and she's entitled to special treatment. She drove with a suspended license two times in a roll and even though she was supposed to spend time in a jail, they tried to instead to put her in home confinement due to some sort of medical condition. I cannot tell you how happy I was when that judge ordered her butt to be thrown back in jail. And how do you like her crying and carrying on when she was forced back into the police car, all the while making sure that the TV camers could see her? Oh, boo hoo, the poor little rich girl actually has to do jail time. I would have been like, "Just get in that jail cell and shut the hell up, you spoiled rich brat!" I know that's extremely harsh but I hate everything that woman stands for and I was just happy to see her forced to do some hard time and not get off scott-free like Lindsay Lohan always does. In fact, I despise her so much that I'm almost tempted to see that House of Wax remake just so I can see her die. (What sucks about that is that I've heard she's not all that bad of an actor and if I watched her and made that judgement for myself, I would hate myself for a long time.) In all honest, though, screw her and the horse she rode in on, spoiled, stupid little rich skank.

Megan Fox: She's the prime example of an addage that I've gone by my entire life: I don't care how sexy a woman is, if she doesn't have any class, I'm not going to find her attractive. This girl is a complete asshole. There are so many stories of the crap she's done, like her burning the same fan not once but twice, the second time knowing that she had done it the first time; all the rumors of her being a complete bitch during the making of the second Transformers movie, including her stupidly comparing Michael Bay to Hitler, which led to her being fired off the third one (again, not defending Bay but just saying that was a dumb statement on Fox's part); said that she would bargan with Megatron to blow up middle America because it's home to homophobic hillbillies; and she once said that men in their 20's are a waste of time because they're immature and the like. As someone who is 25 years old, I just want to say, "Well, to hell with you then, bitch." Megan Fox may be very good looking but she's a classless, thankless brat of a woman whom I'm not going to waste my time with.

Nick Palumbo: Remember when I said that Eli Roth can't take any criticism towards his movies? Well, here's somebody who really can't take it. I've never seen Murder Set Pieces and I don't ever plan to because it's just another dime-a-dozen unpleasant, "torture porn" style movie that was prevalent around that time. However, the behavior of its director has caused me to decide that I will never watch anything else he creates. This man is a complete asshole. He's one of the meanest filmmakers I have ever come across in terms of not being able to accept criticism towards his work. Whenever somebody criticizes something he's done, he goes crazy and personally attacks them. He's also been known to bad-mouth people on message boards whenever they've done something to piss him off. Friendships he's had with other filmmakers such as Bill Lustig and Fred Vogel have ended in very ugly ways due to comments that they've made about his films and the like. Basically, Palumbo gets angry at and hates everybody who doesn't like his movies. That attitude combined with an ego the size of the Grand Canyon and, from what I've heard, a penchant for actually hurting his actors to get the desired performances makes him a very unsavory character in my book and someone whose films I'm not going to waste my time with.

Tonya Harding: I'm kind of cheating here because Tonya Harding isn't an actor or a filmmaker but this woman pisses me off so much that I had to say something about her. I'm not a sports fan and I certainly don't care about ice-skating but the idea of her conspiring to injure her number-one competitor just so she could have a shot at a championship that would have led to her being involved in the Olympics (which it did) is just crappy all-around. But her behavior in the years since then just adds more fuel to the fire. Be it her constant insane accusations of being stalked, having her truck stolen, or throwing a hubcap at her ex-boyfriend or her lackluster attempts to become famous by doing everything from a sex-tape to becoming a manager for a wrestler and a very brief attempt at a music career, I think it's clear that Harding is a trashy, sleazy woman who is desperate for attention. Unfortunately, she has found some kind of popularity by becoming a commentator for the show The Smoking Gun Presents: World's Dumbest... I normally like shows like that but I refuse to watch a show where Harding, after all the stuff that she's done, can comment on how stupid other people are. And on a final note, let me remind you that Harding got all upset after President Obama made a very brief joke about her during a speech and she was like, "Where does the president get off spending so much time making fun of me?" At first she seemed mad but then suddenly, she changed her tune and said that even bad publicity is good publicity and when the interviewer said, "You're a piece of work," Harding responded, "Do you think I care what other people think?" She ended that statement by saying, "I bet that you'll still pay money to come see me." I rest my case. First-class bitch.

Andy Dick: Now, we're getting into people that I genuinely hate all around. Everything about Andy Dick just enrages me to no end. Let's name all the crap he's done. His inability to keep his hands to himself, constantly groping and touching women inappropriately; his inability to hold his liquor, which often leads to the aforementioned sexual misconduct that he partakes in; his inability to know when he's taking something too far, like when he exposed himself to the audience during one stand-up routine or when he screamed the N-word during another, the latter of which happened just two weeks after Michael Richards' ill-fated stand-up. It's not just his constant misconduct that makes me hate him but it's also simply his weasely demeanor and way of acting whenever he's in a movie or on TV. But the thing that really makes me believe that Dick is a horrible human being is the comment that he allegedly made about Phil Hartman. According to Jon Lovitz, Dick once came up to him at a restaurant and said, "I put the Phil Hartman curse on you, you're the next one to die." As if that wasn't bad enough, Dick is supposedly the one who caused Hartman's wife to have a relapse of her addiction to cocaine by giving her some of the stuff, which led to her murdering Hartman and then killing herself. Now, of course, this is only coming from the mouth of Lovitz so there's no proof of this but I don't know why Lovitz would just make it up, seeing as how Dick isn't exactly a big star that he's trying to take down. Bottom line, if all that crap about Phil Hartman is true, then three words for you, Andy Dick: "Go to hell!" I guess that's why his last name is Dick.

Trey Parker and Matt Stone: I hope to God I'm not sonding like Leonard Maltin on here when I go on about how I am deeply offended by some of the actual movies and television shows that some of these people do. If you've read some of my reviews, you'd know that I'm hardly a prude. But sometimes, I'm shocked at what many people find funny. Maybe I am a little too sensitive and "milk and cookies" when it comes to some things but some things that are meant to humurous and satirical just strike me not only as offensive but downright mean-spirited. Case in point: South Park. It's a very successful animated comedy, acclaimed for its colorful characters and biting satire but I just don't like it. I know the thing's entire point is to be shocking and provocative, to tackle subjects that most other people wouldn't dare touch, but I've just never liked the show. I know it has a lot of fans and is still one of Comedy Central's biggest moneymakers fifteen years after its debut but it's not for me. That said, I never used to have anything against the show's creators, Trey Parker and Matt Stone. They were very flamboyant and loud but I never had anything personal against them. In fact, I cracked up when I heard that they made fun of Tom Cruise in an episode of South Park. As you learned earlier, Cruise is another person I don't care for so I was glad somebody had the nerve to try to bring him down, even more so that they did it on a nationally-broadcast television show. But what really offended me was when they made fun of Steve Irwin just a couple of months after he was killed. To me, that was absolutely distasteful and horrible to make fun of such a beloved person not long his tragic death. Right then and there, I was like, "Okay, to hell with you two. You guys are insensitive assholes." And I still stand by that summation. If you're a fan of South Park, fine. But to me, I can't support it or anything else its creators come up with because, other than the reason I gave earlier, the men behind them are complete and utter douchebags who don't care who they hurt.

Lars von Trier: I really don't like pretentious filmmakers and not only is Lars von Trier very pretentious in his ways of filmmaking but he's also a scumbag. My reasons for disliking him so much have nothing to do with that stuff he said about Adolf Hitler that got him banned from the Cannes Film Festival (although that was very stupid on his part) but just the crap he does in his movies. Antichrist is one of the most unpleasant, misogynistic movies imaginable, with crap like Willem Dafoe getting smashed in the crotch and Charlotte Gainsbourg giving him a handjob until he cums blood. Yeah, if someone like Eli Roth does that, it's considered "torture porn" and revolting but if von Trier does it, then it's considered art. (And no, I'm not sticking up for Roth, I'm just trying to make a point and I'm well aware that Brad Jones has said a lot of stuff like that but you know what, he makes sense to me.) Not only that but in that film, there's a shot of a baby bird, which is still alive, covered with ants. I hope to God that was fake but if that was real, I want to know von Trier didn't get raked across the coals like Ruggero Deodatto did when he killed real animals during the making of Cannibal Holocaust and put the footage in the film. I don't care if von Trier suffers from depression a lot either. That doesn't give him the excuse of his films being him working out his depression. They're still pretentious, scummy art films, not to mention that the guy has an enormous ego. I know he has followers and whatever floats their boat is fine but Lars von Trier rubs me the wrong way.

Mel Gibson: I know that I've been coming across as a hateful person on this post but the truth is, I just cannot tolerate incomprehensible hatefulness or stupidity and a lot of the people on this list have either been one or the other. My next to last person on this list is a major example of the former. He was once one of the biggest stars on Earth but later in his life, his apparent biggotry and hatred boiled over so much that he turned the public on a scale that I've never seen before. What can say about Mel Gibson's apparent insanity that hasn't already been said? Who knows if it's a psychotic breakdown or what but I think it's plain to see that he has serious issues. He insists that he's not anti-semitic and yet every time he opens his mouth, he pretty much proves that he is, be it with that DUI incident or otherwise. I know he wants to blame it on alcohol but I just feel that you wouldn't say that stuff if you weren't anti-semitic. And then there are those screaming, insane phone messages. Everybody has said that that woman is a gold-digger and she probably is but the way he's acting in those messages, screaming and ranting just because she fell asleep when they were supposed to go to the jacuzzi, speaks volumes for his state of mind. Also, he used more than his fair share of racial slurs in those messages, whether it be the N-word or "wetbacks." He's going to insist that he's not racist and yet he gets recorded saying that stuff. And he keeps refusing to take responsibility for his actions, be it his saying that those tapes were edited or his half-hearted apologies to those anti-semitic remarks he made during the DUI incident (you watch that Diane Sawyer interview with him that was conducted months after that happened and you can tell he's full of so much shit). He even once insulted the gay community back in the early 90's and refused to apologize for that too. It doesn't help that he's got a lot of friends in Hollywood who are constantly kissing his butt and insisting he's not racist, like Whoopi Goldberg saying that because she knows Mel and has for a long time, she is sure he isn't racist. To that, I say, "Whoopi, you're not with him 24/7. How do you know he's not racist when you're not around?' I could be speaking out of line here but I just feel that all of these incidents can't just be coincidence. I think it's obvious that Mel Gibson has some severe issues and prejudices which eventually caught up with him and destroyed his career.

Victor Salva: Mel Gibson was originally going to be my most hated person on the list but after thinking about it, I decided that if anybody deserves to be at the top, it's this creep who took the innocence of a 12-year old kid and yet, continued to make movies afterward. In my introduction to this list, I mentioned that I have had mixed feelings towards filmmaker Roman Polanski, in that I feel pity for how tragic his life has been and yet, I'm appalled at what he did to that young girl. Victor Salva, however, is somebody that I feel nothing but disgust for. He claims that the stepfather he grew up with physically abusive but even if that is true, I don't except that as a reason why I should excuse his actions. While they both apparently had tumultuous upbringings, I find Polanski's tragic life easier to sympathize with than Salva's. I'm not saying that somebody who was physically abused as a kid is less pitiable than some whose parents and pregnant wife were murdered but that in this case, I feel much more sympathy for Polanski. Salva is just a creep. During the making of his first film, Clownhouse, Salva not only molested a 12-year old actor on the set but he even videotaped it. He was sentenced to three years in prison but only served fifteen months. How is that just? He may have been forced to register as a sex offender, sure, but that is not right in the slightest. What's worse, you would think that would have killed his filmmaking career but no, he's still doing movies. He's directed films like Powder, Nature of the Beast, and the Jeepers Creepers movies. While I do think the first Jeepers Creepers is a fairly good horror film, I fend it difficult to enjoy knowing what a scumbag the guy who directed is. You can even see Salva put some of his pedophile thoughts into the Creeper with how it apparently sniffed the lead teenager's clothes in the original and the way it winks at the teenagers in the bus in the second film. Writing about this just makes my skin crawl. I will review those films some day but, as fair a horror film as I think the first one is, I don't know if it will remain in my collection for very long. It just amazes me that other people are serving jail time for lesser crimes whereas Salva once did something so horrific and yet, is still allowed to direct movies. Therefore, I can't think of a better reason for him to be at the top of the list of actors and filmmakers that I don't like.

So, that's it. Those are the actors and directors that I either don't care for because their films don't interest me or because they've done stuff that makes it impossible for me to support them. I hope you enjoyed it and keep in mind that this is simply my opinion. If you like any of these people, that's fine. No foul. But, as I said, few of these people have films that you will see me review on here for the reasons that I've stated above. See you next time.